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Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV

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91 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Sep 28 2016, 14:34

whatsgoingon

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Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
Bwfc1958 wrote:This chap is almost as unlucky as you Boncey. 

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/28/unluckiest-man-in-australia-bitten-on-the-penis-by-a-spider-for/amp/?client=ms-android-h3g-gb
I'm suspicious to be honest, once is unlucky twice leads me to believe he quite enjoys it and puts himself in that position.
People pay a lot of money for that kind of stuff. Very Happy

92 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Sep 28 2016, 17:05

Bread2.0

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
whatsgoingon wrote:

I'm suspicious to be honest, once is unlucky twice leads me to believe he quite enjoys it and puts himself in that position.

That is exactly what I thought when I read it.

Most people hide in the bogs because they hate their job and would rather play Angry Birds but I think this guy's just a perv.

93 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Sep 28 2016, 19:00

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Got to love those beatniks.

94 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Sep 28 2016, 21:06

Numpty 28723

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Real gone, man!

95 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Sep 28 2016, 21:39

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Lionel,really. Shocked

96 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Sep 29 2016, 21:18

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Cracking game of rugby in Warrington tonight. Can't call it after 50 min.

97 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sat Oct 01 2016, 20:59

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
I'm shocked. I used to like Dawkins.

98 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sat Oct 01 2016, 21:08

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
The full horror.

Renowned non-believer Sir Richard Dawkins has caused an outcry by telling the entertainer Bruce Forsyth that he "doesn't exist". Dawkins made the statement, along with the surprise announcement of his new book, The Bruce Delusion, at a special debate between himself and Forsyth held in BBC Centre last night. The debate was chaired by wee Jimmy Krankie, 68, of The Krankies fame.

In a video of the debate posted on YouTube (but since taken down), Forsyth looks clearly taken aback, while gasps can be heard from the audience. "How can you say that when I'm sitting here right before your very eyes?" Brucie counters. "You're just a figment of our collective imaginations," responded Dawkins, sharply. "One can't believe everything one sees."


The statement caused walkouts and cries of "Heathen!" and "Heratic!" from around the auditorium, but Dawkins controversial tirade continued. "As I was just telling my random-chance wife Lalla Ward last night, Brucie's biography Bruce Forsyth: My Life in Entertainment (£7.99, Swindler Press) is filled with inaccuracies and fantastical nonsense. It's no more than a fairy story for deluded Brucites. The chapter 'Generations' is a particular offender, with references to 'cuddly toys' and proclamations such as 'And lo, didn't he do well?' And are we really supposed to belief that Brucie 'flew down from the moon on a winged horse'? Poppycock. With the emphasis on 'cock'."

And it didn't stop there. "Are you seriously telling me that you are collection of 'sentient atoms'?" blasted Dawkins. "No, I didn't say anything of the sort," retorted Forsyth

Meanwhile, debate has been raging in the comments section of Dawkins'website , with even some of his most fervent adherents reeling in shock. User RationalJohn commented, "I don't believe in anything 'spiritual', 'supernatural' or 'paranormal' or anything a bit 'woo' (sic), but to deny the existence of undoubtedly our greatest entertainer is taking things a little too far, even for me, Richard.", while Atheist4Evah said, "Richard, how could you? While I fully accept that his roles in the likes of Bedknobs and Broomsticks and little-seen sitcom Slinger's Day are fictional, the man himself is absolutely solid and real. Shame on you, Richard Dawkins."

At the end of the debate, host wee Jimmy cried "Fandabidozi!" and hurled abuse at husband Ian in the audience, to the delight of the assembled throng.

99 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sat Oct 01 2016, 21:16

Bwfc1958

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Tinned Toms - You know it makes sense!
If he doesn't exist then who's that in your shed?

100 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sat Oct 01 2016, 21:31

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Bwfc1958 wrote:If he doesn't exist then who's that in your shed?
I've no idea. I'm not holding him.

He gets his post and milk delivered every day. I think he goes fishing on Sundays.

Noticed him two years ago when the council asked me to reshape my topiary,so as not to outrage the elderly lady living opposite.

He'd locked himself in,and I was unable to get to my clippers.

Anyway,the bush was meant to be a rocket. I can't help how other people think.

101 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Tue Oct 04 2016, 20:10

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

102 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Tue Oct 04 2016, 20:16

Bread2.0

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Is that him off Blue Peter?

Valerie Summat?

103 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Tue Oct 04 2016, 20:34

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Calm down. Get the kettle on.

104 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Tue Oct 04 2016, 21:14

Bwfc1958

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Tinned Toms - You know it makes sense!
Admit it. You scoured the Internet looking for a picture of a Bruce Forsyth kettle but settled on a Panda when you couldn't find one.

105 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Tue Oct 04 2016, 21:20

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

106 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Oct 05 2016, 16:23

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Never had these before. Shocked

107 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Oct 05 2016, 16:46

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Joey Barton charged with betting on 44 football matches.

108 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Wed Oct 05 2016, 17:07

karlypants

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
boltonbonce wrote:Joey Barton charged with betting on 44 football matches.
He really is one big dickhead is Joey.

109 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 09:18

whatsgoingon

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Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
karlypants wrote:
boltonbonce wrote:Joey Barton charged with betting on 44 football matches.
He really is one big dickhead is Joey.
I'm surprised he can kick a ball he's shot himself in the foot that often

110 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 12:48

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Found a silver angel at work today. On the back it's inscribed 'Hope'. Is our season about to take off?

111 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 16:26

whatsgoingon

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Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
No we're shit, you'll probably accidentally swallow it and end up in A & E

112 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 16:58

y2johnny

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
VOLUME 4 BITCHES

http://Www.thefacefittester.co.uk

113 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 18:43

sunlight

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Nicky Hunt
Nicky Hunt
karlypants wrote:
boltonbonce wrote:Joey Barton charged with betting on 44 football matches.
He really is one big dickhead is Joey.

I dont think he has ever voluntarily read a book.

114 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 18:59

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
y2j 3.0 wrote:VOLUME 4 BITCHES
Well spotted Johnny.
I must insist at this point,that your name is reinstated as the originator of my thread.
Something as important as this can't be besmirched with 'Guest'.
Faber & Faber are looking at publishing the first volume next year,with,I'm hoping,a forward by BF.
I emailed him on Wednesday, but he sent the police round,so I'll leave it for a couple of weeks.

115 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 19:11

y2johnny

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Could always just start it now as volune 4 and they archive this one

http://Www.thefacefittester.co.uk

116 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 19:25

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
y2j 3.0 wrote:Could always just start it now as volune 4 and they archive this one
The hidden workings of this place are a mystery to me. I am however,expecting an effusive tribute from Nat.
I think I'll call volume four The Wonder Years.

117 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Thu Oct 06 2016, 19:36

y2johnny

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Well lets see what kp says (if he can tear himself away from his "clients")

http://Www.thefacefittester.co.uk

118 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sat Oct 08 2016, 20:24

sunlight

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Nicky Hunt
Nicky Hunt
I noticed the short video on Beatniks, above. Until a short while ago I didn`t know what they were ( and for sure I still don`t ), and it reminded myself of some short research I did to learn about what Beatniks were. The reason I say it, is I love my researches, it is bliss. To slacken my thoughts into a gentler happiness and escape into another world. There are so many things to learn in the world. Regular researches and frequent cups of Coffee. It attracted me because it is black and white, and I love black and white films, to be in a time where life is slow and there is time to think.

119 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sun Oct 09 2016, 13:23

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
sunlight wrote:I noticed the short video on Beatniks, above. Until a short while ago I didn`t know what they were ( and for sure I still don`t ), and it reminded myself of some short research I did to learn about what Beatniks were. The reason I say it, is I love my researches, it is bliss. To slacken my thoughts into a gentler happiness and escape into another world. There are so many things to learn in the world. Regular researches and frequent cups of Coffee. It attracted me because it is black and white, and I love black and white films, to be in a time where life is slow and there is time to think.
I live my life in black and white. Can't remember seeing much of this going on in times past,or the present for that matter.
Would you buy a mattress at the door?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-37579587

120 Re: Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IV on Sun Oct 09 2016, 13:33

sunlight

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Nicky Hunt
Nicky Hunt
boltonbonce wrote:
I live my life in black and white. Can't remember seeing much of this going on in times past,or the present for that matter.
Would you buy a mattress at the door?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-37579587

To be honest, as I drive around Bolton, I see mattresses laying in quite a lot of back streets for anyone lucky enough to want one for free. To be serious for a moment, Id say whoever is selling those door to door is living in another world from the rest of us ( or great lever )

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