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BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL

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1 BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 1:45 am

Natasha Whittam

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
It's been a while so I thought I'd treat you to a look around the wonderful world of forums for some completely biased comments and meltdowns from Barnsley, Burton and Notts Forest fans.

Rzareteh starts us off with some fair points:

Rzarecteh (Notts Forest) wrote:Let’s relegate these fuckers.

1. They charge ridiculous ticket prices for a key game
2. Chairman comes out and begs his supporters to back the team despite the stupid pricing
3. They aren’t giving us more allocation instead are leaving it empty
4. Owner is picking the team on Sunday
5. Phil Parkinson is their manager and all they do is hoof it forward

All these signs point to a Bolton relegation in a beautiful stroke of karma.

CloughIsGod took too many little blue pills:

CloughIsGod (Burton) wrote:I've woken up this morning with a massive erection for survival. We will do it, I'm convinced. Bolton and Barnsley will lose and we'll get at least a draw.

YorkshireRed127 may have problems with basic English, but his prophecy skills are unrivalled:

YorkshireRed127 (Barnsley) wrote:im not confident I can see us geting stufffed an bolton wining

Upon reflection SiForest65 is probably glad he didn't get a ticket:

SiForest65 (Notts Forest) wrote:Apparently the reason we didn’t get more tickets was because they didn’t deem it to be cost effective. What a shite club, I really hope we relegate them.

But CountyClive70 is chuffed with his ticket:

CountyClive70 (Notts Forest) wrote:£35 is a bargain to see those cheating, diving, time-wasting, cheating, diving, cheating cunts get relegated.

Did HeckysThump take a wrong turn and end up in Horwich?

HeckysThump (Barnsley) wrote:Ive arrived in derby and its full of munters in shorts and tatoos

Forest_Fanny is a poet:

Forest_Fanny (Notts Forest) wrote:Fuck Bolton, fuck Barnsley, fuck Burton. But fuck Bolton more.

PirelliPete1982 gets it spectacularly wrong:

PirelliPete1982 (Burton) wrote:Bolton looked dead last weekend, no fight or heart. It's between us and Barnsley.

Tel has a soft spot for Bolton:

El Tel Fell (Notts Forest) wrote:I fuckin hate Bolton and their shit ground, shit fans, shit lion mascot, shit comedians, and shit accent.

MattMillsMachine has clearly travelled back in time 30 years:

MattMillsMachine (Notts Forest) wrote:Arrived in Bolton an hour ago to find their stadium is now a large shop. Some local with a pie in his mouth uttered something about moving grounds to Norwich. What the fuck is going on?

I hope King_of_Barnsley is at home and not at Derby:

King_of_Barnsley (Barnsley) wrote:5 Minutes to kick off and I just shit myself. The first of many over the next two hours I suspect.

The games all kick off and Notts Forest quickly miss an absolute sitter:

Fuck me, how did he miss
Same old Forest, finishing skills of a twat
shitbags
its an omen, were gonna lose
Un-fucking-believable!!
calm down, calm down we're gonna shit this game
I've given up time in the sunshine for these useless tossers?
Early days, still think it will be 3 or 4 nil to the Forest

But the first goal of the day to impact the relegation battle comes at Pride Park, where Derby go in front against Barnsley:

Oh just fuck off, we couldn't even hold out for 15 minutes
Fucking Jerome of all people, that guy couldn't hit a fucking cow if he was sitting on it
I can already hear the laughter coming from Bolton and Burton
Morais out! Can we change manager at half time?
Spineless
There's more fight in a three-legged gerbil

But 10 minutes later Preston score against Burton, and Barnsley are out of the relegation zone:

I fucking love Preston
My first born will be called Preston if they keep us up
Typical Barnsley, always relying on others
FUCKING COME ON YOU LAZY CUNTS
just need forest to score now, i'd be very happy for us all to lose
Come on Forest, I'll have your babies if you beat Bolton
KNOB ENDER FOR LIFE (well, until 3pm)
Come on Barnsley, we're behind you, COME ON!

Half-time arrives and as it stands Bolton and Burton are going down, Barnsley will be safe.

Reg has a point:

RegHollis (Barnsley) wrote:I've never been so happy to be losing

Number9Bus is confident:

Number9Bus (Notts Forest) wrote:How have we not scored? We were fucking superb in that half, only one winner here.

ColnBakerThe1st is less so:

ColnBakerThe1st (Notts Forest) wrote:We look nervy, can see Bolton sneaking this

Cloughs_New_Shoes

Cloughs_New_Shoes (Burton) wrote:We need to find a goal from somewhere, anywhere. Barnsley are going down, it's just up to us now

NilesPane loves an 80's pop icon:

NilesPane (Notts Forest) wrote:sort yerselves out you bunch of overpayed prima madonnas

Keep your sexual fantasies to yourself Thomas:

Thomas Freeman (Notts Forest) wrote:That mascot can suck my dick.

Captain Sinister doesn't like our passion:

Captain Sinister (Notts Forest) wrote:Bolton are the dirtiest, nastiest side in the Championship. I don't know why the referees haven't stamped on Bolton because of their anti-football.

Le Juif Rouge is another Mystic Meg:

Le Juif Rouge Notts Forest wrote:If all these low scores stay the same until HT it is going to get very feisty in the second half in few games particularly the last 10mins.

Dumpface has his spies out:

DumpFace Barnsley wrote:ive herd bolton are doing their usual dirty stuff

MXJ has clearly been watching us every week, we feel your pain sir:

MXJ (Notts Forest) wrote:Bolton are fucking disgusting- they deserve League 1

We really hope so:

LowerBridgfordHerts (Notts Forest) wrote:Apparently Pratley wants to come here.

Second half kicks off and Barnsley quickly go 2-0 down:

That's it, I'm out. Fuck off Morais.
No heart, no passion, no bottle, no skill, no brains
You just know Bolton are going to pinch a winner
We could get tonked and still stay up. I love football!!
Stay cool folks, Burton are still losing. WE ARE STAYING UP

But then Burton equalise at PNE and the Barnsley fans go into meltdown:

please fuck off burton
just our luck that the shittest team in the league find some form
predictable, just predictable
fuck a duck
I'd say I can't believe it. But I can. Fuck off.
this is my last season supporting barnsley
FUCK YOU BARNSLEY (SUPPORTER OF 35 YEARS)
I'm watching Harrogate next season
It's bad enough that we can't rely on our own team to keep us up, but now we can't even rely on others!
fuck, fuck, fuk, fukk

And then to add to the meltdown, Le Fondre puts Bolton in front:

CampFan definitely hasn't seen us play:

CampFan23 (Barnsley) wrote:You just knew it didn't you. Fucking Bolton couldn't buy a win for months and then play like Real Madrid when it matters. Fuck off!

Something we often wish we could do ourselves Henry:

HenrysWinkle (Barnsley) wrote:Fuck, I'd forgotten about Bolton.

Greg is angry:

Greg_H_291 (Barnsley) wrote:FUCK OFF BOLTON YOU SCUMMY ARSEWIPES

Surely Shitfan should be happy his team are shit?

ShitFan98 wrote:ha ha, we're gonna finish second bottom. we are so shit

There's a bit of a meltdown on the Forest board too:

That's annoying
Piss weak defending
Fuck of Karanka
Been coming a while that, couldn’t hold on to the ball
Come on Burton!
Loves a goal against us Le Fondre
Embarrassing, they want it more
Terrible defending. What the fuck was Hobbs doing?
We've had no ball around their box for a while now. We were getting pushed deeper and deeper.
Hobbs passing it to their striker 6 yards out.
Am I right in thinking that if Burton score again that these dirty fuckers will still go down even if they beat us?
If we save Bolton I will never watch another Forest game again

But Forest equalise straight away:

FUKIN GET IN!
shove that up your chubby northern arses bolton
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
Bolton 1-3 Forest. Destiny.
About fucking time, now kick on!
FUCK YOU BOLTON
Throwing bottles at our players? I hope this team goes into admin.
Them missile chucking twats are about as accurate as Bolton’s forwards.
Dodgy keeper. Hilarious.
Fuck the “Trotters”

And in double quick time Forest are 2-1 up:

YESSSS!!!!!! HAHAHAHA BYE BOLTON!!!!!
fuck off back to league 1 you twats
COLBACK BRINGING SEXY BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahaha
SEX WEE. Get in there Ginger!!
"To be fair, Bolton are terrible". I love the radio sometimes.
Down, down, Bolton are down (almost)
I like to think this is repayment for selling us Clough
The two players lofty the lion was trying to wind up both scored. We should sign him for next season.
Phil Parkinson could lick my ball sack.
NOTLOB KCUF FFO

So at this point Burton are staying up:

sordells_eye_monocle celebrates a little early:

sordells_eye_monocle (Burton) wrote:I don't fucking believe it, we're going to stay up. WE ARE STAYING UP AGAIN!!!!!

TykesTwister resorts to begging:

TykesTwister (Barnsley) wrote:Come on PNE, just one goal and we stay up. I'm begging you!!!!!!!!

Shoot_First46 prefers a more direct method:

Shoot_First46 (Barnsley) wrote:Preston players, I will curse your dicks for eternity if you don't score.

But inside a minute Bolton score twice and lead 3-2 to leave Barnsley and Burton in the relegation zone. Meltdown city:

Good lord
Oh my word
you couldn't make it up
you are fukin shitin me
It's the Forest way
Bag of shite
YOU FUCKIN COCKSUCKERS
Awful defending. Sloppy header to trickle in.
What in the blue fuck was that? Its costing me a fucking fortune.
I thought Fray and Laws said Bolton were not very good?
i need to punch someone
What the fuck were our Centre Backs and Goalkeeper doing there?
Kampino wants fucking for that. It was frankly shit.
Wheater and Wilbraham shouts League 1
All 3 of Boltons goals were down to our crap defending.
Bad day, all the wankerish teams getting the results they wanted
I cant work out whether we're coming or going
Can't stop embarrassing ourselves
karanka you kant
Oh well, on to next season... this time next season, Rodney, we'll be Champions.
What the fuck ref
Pathetic Forest. Mentally weak as usual.
23rd loss of the season, same as Sunderland, Bolton, and Barnsley; fuck off Forest.

I think Thomas is quite a bitter man:

Thomas Freeman (Notts Forest) wrote:Eh who cares, burton are strong enough to come back up and Bolton are actually weak as piss. They'll go back down next season.

Bangerz doesn't like us:

Bangerz (Notts Forest) wrote:Majorly pissed off with Forest for keeping those Bolton twats in this league

We've all been there JPsychoC66:

JPsychoC66 (Notts Forest) wrote:'Fuck off Forest' is my final thought of the season.

Quite true Wes:

Wes Organ (Notts Forest) wrote:Football is the best sport in the world if you enjoy having your bollocks bitten.

Jah begs forgiveness:

Jah (Notts Forest) wrote:Dear Burton Fans

I'm so sorry about that, we wanted it to be Bolton too...

Please forgive us

The Barnsley fans had long since accepted their fate:

Some comeback by Bolton that.
that's what happens when you don't give up unlike our shower
There's the difference today, Burton and Bolton scrapping for their lives, our shower just chalking fcuk on it and hoping other sides would do us a favour.
You couldn’t make it up. We could so easily have stayed up today if Forest hadn’t collapsed in the last 5 minutes. Makes it all the worse.
Heartbreaking the way it happened. Spent half an hour desperately checking PNE’s game for them to score in last second when it no longer mattered.
if we'd put a shift in today people would have said fair play we weren't good enough, but it wasn't even that, we just rolled over
he's a shower, get rid, we have no desire, no confidence, no organisation with anything...defence, attack midfield, set plays, shambles
That was bad even by our low standards. Embarrassing.
I knew we'd get relegated, but to lose out to Bolton??? FUCK OFF


I think we can share Troffs pain, we'd have been saying the same after relegation:

Troff (Barnsley) wrote:Absolute embarrassment.

No fight, no balls, no effort.

I’m ashamed today. I can take defeat, I can take relegation. Capitulation with no fcuks given? They can all fcuk off in the summer.

North Yorks Red is angry:

North Yorks Red (Barnsley) wrote:I don't know what is worse ,we went down with barely a whimper, a freak last minute burst from a shite team like Bolton relegated us, or the fact that we have chucked point after point away all season by making the same mistakes.

Troff again. I like him.

Troff (Barnsley) wrote:Knew their only chance was to do it for themselves, found themselves behind with three minutes plus stoppages to go.

Turned it around, against all odds, and have their reward.

We, well, did what realistically we ought to all have predicted we’d do.

To finish in the bottom three this season, as poor as it has been, and below Birmingham and Bolton who in other years would have been relegated comfortably, we deserve everything we get.

Dust down and go again. I’m appalled at the capitulation today but with a new manager and a few fresh faces on the pitch, this old face will be at his seat come August as I will be come what may.

Bolton have Blackburn and Wigan coming up to give them some more derby games, good luck to them.

Forest fans like BryanRoy are still moaning:

BryanRoy (Notts Forest) wrote:Just thought Bolton were total dog shit.

Bangerz is still banging on:

Bangerz (Notts Forest) wrote:Fuck Bolton. Seriously, fuck Bolton.

So that's about it. Thanks for reading. I'll leave the last word to a funny little spat on a Barnsley forum, when one poor sod thinks Barnsley have stayed up:

KennyHarmy2: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! FUCKING YESSSSSSSS!! Preston have scored!!!! STAYING UP

London Tyke: what the fuck you talking about kenny?

KennyHarmy2: Preston with last minute winner! Check Soccer Saturday!

KennyHarmy2: STAYING UP STAYING UP CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!! DANCIN ROUND THE ROOM!!

London Tyke: I know pne have scored but you know Bolton are winning don't you

KennyHarmy2: Fuck

2 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:03 am

NickFazer

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El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf
Brilliant Nat
What a Face



Last edited by NickFazer on Tue May 08, 2018 2:18 am; edited 1 time in total

3 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:08 am

boltonbonce

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Hilarious Nat. Strange how all these other supporters appear to be bitter,twisted freaks.

We can only think ourselves blessed.

4 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:11 am

Natasha Whittam

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
NickFazer wrote:Brilliant Hat

I wasn't wearing a hat.

5 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:12 am

Leeds_Trotter

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Great work Nat.

6 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:15 am

finlaymcdanger

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El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf
Very good, Hat. Thank you. Poor KennyHarmy2 at the end is hilarious.

7 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:25 am

Boggersbelief

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Why does everybody hate Bolton?

Good work Nat

8 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:28 am

xmiles

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Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo
Thanks Nat. Laughing

9 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:55 am

karlypants

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
About time you put Cedrick down and did one of these! 

Good work! :clap: Very Happy

10 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 2:57 am

wanderlust

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Excellent work Nat. Still laughing from that and the Bolton fan who tweeted that if Wilbraham scores the winning goal to keep us he'd get a tattoo of him on his leg.

11 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 3:17 am

Bollotom2014

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Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly
Well done, Nat.
  Looks like Barnsley and Burton seem to think they have a God given right to avoid relegation. As for Notts Forest. They live on the idea a geezer in tights and tunic, fed by a fat friar (as opposed to Frier), mugged his way through the time of the Crusades while fighting the Sheriff of Nottingham. They believe in fairy tales. Are a no-mark town just above Brum, neither Northerners or Southerners. Now in their shoes wouldn't you be bitter? Fecking tossers!

12 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 3:24 am

Norpig

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
i've really missed these, good work Nat  Very Happy

13 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 4:05 am

karlypants

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Norpig wrote:i've really missed these, good work Nat  Very Happy
Only just sobered up? Very Happy

14 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 4:09 am

Cajunboy

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Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly
Great stuff.

That must have taken a lot of hard work.

Have a nice evening.

15 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 5:09 am

observer


Andy Walker
Andy Walker
You certainly waited until the right moment to pull out a BEL.  Remarkable achievement on both fronts!

16 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 5:54 am

wessy

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Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Always good especially when we come out on top.

17 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 6:03 am

BoltonTillIDie

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John McGinlay
John McGinlay
Fantastic!

18 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 7:02 am

Sluffy

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Admin
Great work and an awful lot of effort put in doing so.

Thank you.

19 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 7:32 am

rammywhite

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Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
Well done Nat- enjoyed reading this

20 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 7:40 am

MartinBWFC

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El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf
As always thank you Nat for all the effort you put in doing these.

21 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 8:37 am

okocha

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Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly
:clap: :clap: Nat, you're a star!

22 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 8:53 am

Hip Priest

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Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly
Wonderful stuff that Nat. The perfect end to a brilliant weekend.

23 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Tue May 08, 2018 9:20 am

ege66


David Ngog
David Ngog
Brilliant. Best thing on here by a mile. Perfect end to a perfect ending.

24 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 6:33 am

Tungsten3


David Ngog
David Ngog
Just registered to say great piece of work. Smile

25 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 6:38 am

Natasha Whittam

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Thanks Tungsten. Stick around, hopefully there will be more next season - if we win a match.

26 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 6:42 am

Sluffy

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Admin
Tungsten3 wrote:Just registered to say great piece of work. Smile

Thanks Tungsten3 it's appreciated.

Hope you have a look around the rest of the forum and like what you see and decide to join in posting with the rest of us Nutters!

27 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 6:46 am

Tungsten3


David Ngog
David Ngog
Will have a look around.

Its been difficult finding a forum since yahoogroups bwfc started with the tumbleweed

28 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 7:13 am

Sluffy

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Admin
Tungsten3 wrote:Will have a look around.

Its been difficult finding a forum since yahoogroups bwfc started with the tumbleweed

I wouldn't want to lose you as you've only just found us but there are a number of other BWFC forums about namely -

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

and

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

In all honesty only Wanderers Ways (the top link) and ourselves here on Nuts are regularly active forums, the others really only rely on a handful of posters and generally are only busy on match days.

Hope you find one to your liking (particularly if its us here on Nuts!).



Last edited by Sluffy on Wed May 09, 2018 7:15 am; edited 1 time in total

29 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 7:14 am

Natasha Whittam

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
:facepalm:

30 Re: BEHIND ENEMY LINES - STAYING UP SPECIAL on Wed May 09, 2018 7:17 am

karlypants

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Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Natasha Whittam wrote::facepalm:
Yep! Seconded!  :facepalm:

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