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A shockwave ran round the football world on Saturday when it was discovered that the Half Eaten Hamburger had left his position at Bolton Wanderers Football Club after 16 months.
The news was hard to digest for supporters visiting the gents toilets in the East Stand Upper desperate for a slash prior to the game against Leeds United. Distraught fans were finding it hard to come to terms with the fact that this familiar character will no longer be staring down at them every time they visit the urinals to shake hands with the unemployed.
A statement on display revealed that the Half Eaten Hamburger had moved to London for a new challenge, one which he was sure to "relish."
However, the sudden departure remains shrouded in mystery. There was no advance warning and nothing to suggest that the club would suddenly start cleaning the bogs after all this time. The fact that the rest of the garbage was still there has left everyone perplexed. Has the Half Eaten Hamburger been breadhunted by a rich London club or even, as conspiracy theorists speculate, become the victim of a kidnapping plot?
Club spokesperson Sal Monella said :
"It is with great regret that BWFC announce the departure of the Half Eaten Hamburger. As far as we're aware he left of his own accord and there is no evidence of foul play. What is certain is that none of our cleaning staff would have had anything to do with his removal.
We would like to take this opportunity to wish him well in his new roll. As a gesture of appreciation a testimonial match will be arranged in the near future and it's hoped that many of his former colleagues will be attending. These include the Partially Pecked Pasty, the Barely Bitten Barm Cake and the Semi Scoffed Sausage Roll."
Fans are requested to wear their trousers at half-mast for the upcoming game against Wolves as a gesture of respect.
Oct 2013 - Jan 2015.
Gone But Not Forgotten.
The news was hard to digest for supporters visiting the gents toilets in the East Stand Upper desperate for a slash prior to the game against Leeds United. Distraught fans were finding it hard to come to terms with the fact that this familiar character will no longer be staring down at them every time they visit the urinals to shake hands with the unemployed.
A statement on display revealed that the Half Eaten Hamburger had moved to London for a new challenge, one which he was sure to "relish."
However, the sudden departure remains shrouded in mystery. There was no advance warning and nothing to suggest that the club would suddenly start cleaning the bogs after all this time. The fact that the rest of the garbage was still there has left everyone perplexed. Has the Half Eaten Hamburger been breadhunted by a rich London club or even, as conspiracy theorists speculate, become the victim of a kidnapping plot?
Club spokesperson Sal Monella said :
"It is with great regret that BWFC announce the departure of the Half Eaten Hamburger. As far as we're aware he left of his own accord and there is no evidence of foul play. What is certain is that none of our cleaning staff would have had anything to do with his removal.
We would like to take this opportunity to wish him well in his new roll. As a gesture of appreciation a testimonial match will be arranged in the near future and it's hoped that many of his former colleagues will be attending. These include the Partially Pecked Pasty, the Barely Bitten Barm Cake and the Semi Scoffed Sausage Roll."
Fans are requested to wear their trousers at half-mast for the upcoming game against Wolves as a gesture of respect.
Oct 2013 - Jan 2015.
Gone But Not Forgotten.
