Strange Things.

In the pub at lunch time today I met a retired teacher that lives not far from me and we got talking about everyday shit when he came out with had I ever had a strange experience. I said yeah too many to mention and he said he'd had an awful shock some days ago, he'd gone into a spare bedroom in his bungalow and facing him there was a human leg from the knee down sticking out of the wall which was made of brick and plaster plus an arm from the elbow down. He backed out fast and went for a long walk when he got back he had another look and they had gone. I asked him what he thought about it and he said I don't know maybe I'm losing my mind but I should have touched them to see if they were real.

Fake.

Someone obviously did a shit job of trying to hide a dead body , did Fred West live in a bungalow?

scottjames30 wrote:Someone obviously did a shit job of trying to hide a dead body , did Fred West live in a bungalow?

It must have been a Time Traveller that got his calculations wrong then corrected them.

Jake McHale wrote:
It must have been a Time Traveller that got his calculations wrong then corrected them.

I once heard that there is an aborigines witch doctor called Uluru that now lives in Papua New Guinea who claims to be 149, he regular travels through time and comes back to tell his people what is going to happen to them in the future, he claims he has lived for so long due to the fact that he drinks his own urine and eats woodlouse, and the spirits use him as a go between to the realms of light and beyond.

every night he'll dance round the fire then go into his hut and travel into the future or back in time, hes met Mahatma Gandhi, Napoleon Bonaparte, William Shakespeare, ST.George, Benjamin Franklin, Tutankhamun and a few other famous people.

Magoo.

A mate of mine reckons his girlfriend can make a Quacking sound with her Fanny and it can have a conversation with her arse.

Jake McHale wrote:A mate of mine reckons his girlfriend can make a Quacking sound with her Fanny and it can have a conversation with her arse.

I know a Bird who can make music with her arse, fanny and armpit.

Ive told her to get on Britains got Talent.

I once saw an old man in a pub put his bottom lip over his eyes.

Way back when i was about 15 I was working on the Bread out of skerton rd trafford park for Mothers Pride and we used to deliver to a cafe in moss side where we had our breakfast the cafe was run by this fat bird and her husband she had a thin leg, which made things worse the husband said to the driver i was with show him this ken and ken showed me a series of photo's of his fat wife and her thin leg up on one of the cafe tables squating over a milk bottle and  swallowing it up with her arse, i stayed in the truck from then on.

Jake McHale wrote:A mate of mine reckons his girlfriend can make a Quacking sound with her Fanny and it can have a conversation with her arse.

How old are you?

Hipster_Nebula wrote:

Jake McHale wrote:A mate of mine reckons his girlfriend can make a Quacking sound with her Fanny and it can have a conversation with her arse.

How old are you?

why do you like younger guy's??

Up there in wee ol scotland.

You could have said that in one post.

I could.

But i did'nt.

Jake McHale wrote:Way back when i was about 15 I was working on the Bread out of skerton rd trafford park for Mothers Pride and we used to deliver to a cafe in moss side where we had our breakfast the cafe was run by this fat bird and her husband she had a thin leg, which made things worse the husband said to the driver i was with show him this ken and ken showed me a series of photo's of his fat wife and her thin leg up on one of the cafe tables squating over a milk bottle and  swallowing it up with her arse, i stayed in the truck from then on.

The way we were.

Wow a golden oldie.