Hemorrhoids/Piles?

Has anybody suffered from this? I have had them for a couple of years now and I am still the same. Saw itchy arse and I have to use special ointment every couple of days.

I had a colonoscopy, a couple of years ago, for a different condition, which ruled out any serious medical condition. 

I have private medical insurance, should I just visit my GP and get it over with. (finger up the arse?)

Any help, would be much appreciated! 

Isn't there an operation where you can have them surgically removed?

For those that have never seen them, nice? Doc gave me a special cream but it doesn't work, went to see a specialist who wanted to put a camera up my arse, no chance!!

Had 2 bouts of piles.  Not nice at all.  Visited doctor who gave me a cream and soon cleared up.  Not re-occured for about 10 years now.

Preparation H is an effective over-the-counter remedy in normal cases. The example above will probably require something stronger.

Keegan wrote:Preparation H is an effective over-the-counter remedy in normal cases. The example above will probably require something stronger.

An acid bath?

I was thinking of an ass-transplant, but that might work.

Fiery Jack would shift it.

It looks like an ugly cunt.

Triumph wrote:

For those that have never seen them, nice? Doc gave me a special cream but it doesn't work, went to see a specialist who wanted to put a camera up my arse, no chance!!

 I hope that's not your arse, triumph:shock: 

I've had the Grapes of Wrath before now. Prep H does the job unless they're dangling down to your knees in which case you'll need to get them snipped.

Boggersbelief wrote:

Triumph wrote:

For those that have never seen them, nice? Doc gave me a special cream but it doesn't work, went to see a specialist who wanted to put a camera up my arse, no chance!!

 I hope that's not your arse, triumph:shock: 

Yes me to lol,

Angry Dad wrote:It looks like an ugly cunt.

Thats no way to talk about Blackburn fans,

I knew a bloke who had them dangling out of his arse and they put bands round them to kill them, thats what he said anyway.

Angry Dad wrote:I knew a bloke who had them dangling out of his arse and they put bands round them to kill them, thats what he said anyway.

I heard farmers put elastic bands round pig's bollocks to make them infertile so they fatten up quicker. Same principle of cutting off the blood supply to make them wither. Ouch.

I got told by an old boy that in the old days vets used to shove a cat head first into a wellington boot and pull its nads off, i hope he was winding me up:affraid:

Angry Dad wrote:I knew a bloke who had them dangling out of his arse and they put bands round them to kill them, thats what he said anyway.

 

bwfc71 wrote:Had 2 bouts of piles.  Not nice at all.  Visited doctor who gave me a cream and soon cleared up.  Not re-occured for about 10 years now.

 That reminds me of the guy who went to the Dr and he found a strawberry up his arse. He asked the Dr if he could get it out, the Dr said 'No, but I can give you some cream for it'.

Also, why are Heamorroids not called 'Asterroids'?