Yesterday I didn't fancy schmoozing with my own kind (that's posh folk to you), and as my Dad was holed up in bed with man flu I decided to use his season ticket for the game.
So I approached something called a turnstile to the Lofthouse Stand Lower where a Bolton peasant was behind a cage asking to see my ticket, while all the time checking out my boob job.
Said peasant then informed me that the ticket was a senior citizen season ticket and I would need to go to something called 'Bolton Central' to upgrade my ticket.
I soon found 'Bolton Central', clearly marked by a line of scrubbers queuing like it was benefit day down the post office. They weren't happy when I walked straight to the front of the queue like I was Sam Allardyce at a BBQ, and even when I informed them I was Natasha Whittam I was still greeted with hostility. Surely posh people have a right to jump the queue, after all we are what made this country great.
Anyway, when I finally arrived at the front of the queue I informed the student behind the counter that I needed to upgrade my ticket. So it was Sheffield Wednesday at home, two shit teams near the bottom of the league, how much more expensive could it be? Can you believe it was £22 to upgrade the ticket. Yes, fucking twenty two English pounds. I was informed by the student that the game was category 'A' to which I replied "fuck off".
Category fucking A. How the fuck can a home game with Sheffield fucking Wednesday be classed as a premium match? How can Bolton Wanderers ever be involved in a "premium" match when there's absolutely nothing premium about them.
I demanded to speak to Dougie Freedman but was told he was busy formulating a plan and if I didn't move along Mr Plod would escort me away. Twats! £22! Twats!
Is it any wonder no one gives a shite about BWFC anymore? How can this shit club justify £22 on top of a pre-purchased season ticket? £22 should buy a fucking season ticket to watch these bellends. With change!
So I approached something called a turnstile to the Lofthouse Stand Lower where a Bolton peasant was behind a cage asking to see my ticket, while all the time checking out my boob job.
Said peasant then informed me that the ticket was a senior citizen season ticket and I would need to go to something called 'Bolton Central' to upgrade my ticket.
I soon found 'Bolton Central', clearly marked by a line of scrubbers queuing like it was benefit day down the post office. They weren't happy when I walked straight to the front of the queue like I was Sam Allardyce at a BBQ, and even when I informed them I was Natasha Whittam I was still greeted with hostility. Surely posh people have a right to jump the queue, after all we are what made this country great.
Anyway, when I finally arrived at the front of the queue I informed the student behind the counter that I needed to upgrade my ticket. So it was Sheffield Wednesday at home, two shit teams near the bottom of the league, how much more expensive could it be? Can you believe it was £22 to upgrade the ticket. Yes, fucking twenty two English pounds. I was informed by the student that the game was category 'A' to which I replied "fuck off".
Category fucking A. How the fuck can a home game with Sheffield fucking Wednesday be classed as a premium match? How can Bolton Wanderers ever be involved in a "premium" match when there's absolutely nothing premium about them.
I demanded to speak to Dougie Freedman but was told he was busy formulating a plan and if I didn't move along Mr Plod would escort me away. Twats! £22! Twats!
Is it any wonder no one gives a shite about BWFC anymore? How can this shit club justify £22 on top of a pre-purchased season ticket? £22 should buy a fucking season ticket to watch these bellends. With change!