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Worst Blind Date

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MartinBWFC
karlypants
Mr Magoo
Natasha Whittam
8 posters

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1Worst Blind Date Empty Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 16:14

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

I went on my first ever blind date last night.

I met the guy online and he was everything I wanted in a man: good looking, rich, great body and rich. Unfortunately his camera had broken so I had to take his word for it. But it was worth a punt, who would lie on the internet?

So we met at a local wine bar and it turned out he'd lied somewhat. The 29 year old banker with the hot body and chiseled good looks was actually a 45 year old wanker with a fat body and ugly fat face. I was outraged.

So after a four course meal and two bottles of wine I stormed off. I can do better.

Please share with the world your worst blind date stories to make me feel better. If you've never been on a date (Boggers, Hipster, 1874) just make it up.

2Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 18:11

Mr Magoo

Mr Magoo
Youri Djorkaeff
Youri Djorkaeff

Talking of lying did, you tell him about your awful tits.

3Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 18:12

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Mr Magoo wrote:Talking of lying did, you tell him about your awful tits.

I don't put out on a first date.

4Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 19:20

Mr Magoo

Mr Magoo
Youri Djorkaeff
Youri Djorkaeff

Wonky TiTs, Burnt Pussy what a catch you will be for someone,  they say love is blind.
They will have to be for you mi Dear.

5Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 19:34

Guest


Guest

When I was about 17 my mate asked me to tag along with him and his girlfriend and make a foursome up with her mate.

I said "Ok, but if she's a minger, I'm off."

He said he'd never met her but had seen a picture and she looked quite pretty, so I relaxed a bit.

What he didn't tell me was she was deaf.

In films it's all romantic and stuff when the pretty deaf girl lip reads the bloke's words and they hit it off immediately and end up having beautiful kids and living in a nice house in the country.

My reality was she couldn't tell a word I was saying and fucked off out of the Blue Boar after about an hour and got the 501 home without telling me.

Blown out by a disabled bird.....

6Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 19:40

karlypants

karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Mr Magoo wrote:Wonky TiTs, Burnt Pussy what a catch you will be for someone,  they say love is blind.
They will have to be for you mi Dear.
lol!

7Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:17

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Breadman wrote:

My reality was she couldn't tell a word I was saying and fucked off out of the Blue Boar after about an hour and got the 501 home without telling me.

Blown out by a disabled bird.....

Are you saying disabled women should lower themselves to date you?

8Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:23

MartinBWFC

MartinBWFC
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo

Natasha Whittam wrote:
Breadman wrote:

My reality was she couldn't tell a word I was saying and fucked off out of the Blue Boar after about an hour and got the 501 home without telling me.

Blown out by a disabled bird.....

Are you saying disabled women should lower themselves to date you?
I saw nothing in his post that suggested a date with you.

9Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:34

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Don't start Martin or I'll bury you.

10Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:40

Mr Magoo

Mr Magoo
Youri Djorkaeff
Youri Djorkaeff

Natasha Whittam wrote:Don't start Martin or I'll bury you in my burnt minge.
affraid

11Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:44

MartinBWFC

MartinBWFC
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo

Natasha Whittam wrote:Don't start Martin or I'll bury you.
Amos got a ban for death threats, chill out sweet cheeks.

12Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:45

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

MartinBWFC wrote:
Amos got a ban for death threats, chill out sweet cheeks.

I didn't say you'd be dead when I buried you.

13Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 21:55

MartinBWFC

MartinBWFC
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo

Natasha Whittam wrote:
MartinBWFC wrote:
Amos got a ban for death threats, chill out sweet cheeks.

I didn't say you'd be dead when I buried you.
Hmmm, not a lot in it when plod come knocking, you haven't thought this through, PM Amos he's the ace in the pack

14Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 22:12

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Breadman wrote:When I was about 17 my mate asked me to tag along with him and his girlfriend and make a foursome up with her mate.

I said "Ok, but if she's a minger, I'm off."

He said he'd never met her but had seen a picture and she looked quite pretty, so I relaxed a bit.

What he didn't tell me was she was deaf.

In films it's all romantic and stuff when the pretty deaf girl lip reads the bloke's words and they hit it off immediately and end up having beautiful kids and living in a nice house in the country.

My reality was she couldn't tell a word I was saying and fucked off out of the Blue Boar after about an hour and got the 501 home without telling me.

Blown out by a disabled bird.....

Laughing How true! Back in the seventies I met a lovely girl in Pips in Bolton who had a speech impediment ( or so I thought ). She was very pretty and the noise on the dance floor as Wuthering Heights and Staying Alive were played, left no room for conversation. It was only when we got outside and started looking for taxis that I realised she was deaf. To this day I still regret that my chivalrous streak deserted me, because, with hindsight, I could have saved myself an awful lot of earache in the future..

15Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 22:21

MartinBWFC

MartinBWFC
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo

Reebok Trotter wrote:
Breadman wrote:When I was about 17 my mate asked me to tag along with him and his girlfriend and make a foursome up with her mate.

I said "Ok, but if she's a minger, I'm off."

He said he'd never met her but had seen a picture and she looked quite pretty, so I relaxed a bit.

What he didn't tell me was she was deaf.

In films it's all romantic and stuff when the pretty deaf girl lip reads the bloke's words and they hit it off immediately and end up having beautiful kids and living in a nice house in the country.

My reality was she couldn't tell a word I was saying and fucked off out of the Blue Boar after about an hour and got the 501 home without telling me.

Blown out by a disabled bird.....

Laughing  How true! Back in the seventies I met a lovely girl in Pips in Bolton who had a speech impediment ( or so I thought ). She was very pretty and the noise on the dance floor as Wuthering Heights and Staying Alive were played, left no room for conversation. It was only when we got outside and started looking for taxis that I realised she was deaf. To this day I still regret that my chivalrous streak deserted me, because, with hindsight, I could have saved myself an awful lot of earache in the future..
Poor form there RT, Wuthering heights was classic 80s.

16Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 22:28

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

MartinBWFC wrote:
Reebok Trotter wrote:
Breadman wrote:When I was about 17 my mate asked me to tag along with him and his girlfriend and make a foursome up with her mate.

I said "Ok, but if she's a minger, I'm off."

He said he'd never met her but had seen a picture and she looked quite pretty, so I relaxed a bit.

What he didn't tell me was she was deaf.

In films it's all romantic and stuff when the pretty deaf girl lip reads the bloke's words and they hit it off immediately and end up having beautiful kids and living in a nice house in the country.

My reality was she couldn't tell a word I was saying and fucked off out of the Blue Boar after about an hour and got the 501 home without telling me.

Blown out by a disabled bird.....

Laughing  How true! Back in the seventies I met a lovely girl in Pips in Bolton who had a speech impediment ( or so I thought ). She was very pretty and the noise on the dance floor as Wuthering Heights and Staying Alive were played, left no room for conversation. It was only when we got outside and started looking for taxis that I realised she was deaf. To this day I still regret that my chivalrous streak deserted me, because, with hindsight, I could have saved myself an awful lot of earache in the future..
Poor form there RT, Wuthering heights was classic 80s.

Nope! Even with Alzheimers looming on the not too distant horizon I can assure you it was late seventies. Probably 78/79. I'm too pissed to confirm it on Wikipedia but the few last active braincells are screaming 1978.

PS. Kate Bush was hot!!!

17Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Mon Sep 08 2014, 23:33

White84


Andy Walker
Andy Walker

Debbie Harry was sizzling.
That old saying she'd look good in a bin bag,certainly applies to her in the Atomic Video!

18Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Tue Sep 09 2014, 16:56

scottjames30

scottjames30
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Natasha Whittam wrote:I went on my first ever blind date last night.

Did he wear shades, have a dog with him and carry a white stick? Laughing

19Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Tue Sep 09 2014, 17:12

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Well,it was Christmas,and I'd had a bit to drink.
Worst Blind Date 2973113

20Worst Blind Date Empty Re: Worst Blind Date Tue Sep 09 2014, 18:15

Mr Magoo

Mr Magoo
Youri Djorkaeff
Youri Djorkaeff

Is that Nats new picture without makeup.

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