The Election

Soul Kitchen wrote:

Hipster_Nebula wrote:You're right I apologise that was Karlypants who wants us to fuck off. 

I understand Westminster politics, they don't have the power they wanted, they sit in opposition. I think it's clear most people south of the border don't understand how exciting it is to come together as a nation and completely change the political landscape of our country, voting for positive messages and policies. 

Thats it, don't really understand the antagonism and aggression (mainly from SK and KP granted.)

It's a bit of sport. But I have no respect for most jocks. Alan Nimmo, Rioch, McGinlay and Walker and that's about it.

Thats reasonable.

Natasha Whittam wrote:Brilliant day. Spent it with my middle class friends toasting David and George and the future of the country.

They look after us.

To be honest our country won't go bankrupt, and in years to come we'll all think that its à good thing them getting in because Labour is a joke.

Im pissed off at the bastards with all this rain though, wankers.

To all those who didnt vote or voted snp or green or whatever other minority party had no chance, please abide by the following

No complaining about;
Public transport
Hospital waiting times
Fuel costs
State of the roads
Taxes
Immigration
Independance
The nhs

Pretty much everything as you had your chance to make a change and fucking blew it.

Plant c4 along the wales and scottish divide and float the fuckers for me.

You want your independance, have it, just dont come cap in hand when it all (inevitably) goes tits up.

SNP, yeah its okay to be scottish and proud but dont bite the hand the feeds you (and educates you and makes you better when your ill)

Rant over

I didn't vote because i was in my hot tub

Mr Magoo wrote:I didn't vote because i was in my hot tub

I pissed in it while you were sleeping

My skin was very soft this morning, maybe you should bottle it.


You could call your new company Y2s piss body lotion.

Mr Magoo wrote:My skin was very soft this morning, maybe you should bottle it.


You could call your new company Y2s piss body lotion.

Imagine, instead of avon parties they can just hire me to piss all over them

Here's Y2

Mr Magoo wrote:Here's Y2

This is what i get for actually making a serious post for once

I think compared to the next five years the last 5 will seem like a breeze, anyone working in the public sector or on benefits or even those working who still can't make ends meet, will feel the most pain.
On thing that i noticed that bastard Ian Duncan Smith the man who flexes the muscle, never once appeared in any of the Tory election campaign. Like magic the bald bastard was wheeled out this morning the writings on the wall.
Once again the great British public hang out the poorest in society to dry.

As for the Liberals i find it incredible that Clegg and co did not realise the price that would have to be paid, they gave up principle for power, all those Liberals in  2010 voted to keep the Tories out, Clegg enabled them to govern and by so doing sold out his own supporters, and shit on all those who believed the Liberals had principles. 

Doing it for the country just didn't wash, and they have paid the price i think they are fortunate to have 8 seats and Clegg was lucky to hold on to his seat. Payback time it was inevitable. Be along time before they regain any trust or credibility. What sealed it for me was Clegg was posturing to do the very same thing again, given the chance today he would have shored up the Tories again.

I honestly think that the Labour Party is back to where it was in '92.

Faceless, lacking in popular support, perceived as being weak and clueless and in dire need of reform.

I honestly can't see another Labour government for at least 10 years.

I just hope that this time, when we find the next John Smith, he doesn't peg out unexpectedly and we wind up with another Blair.

This is how it goes.......

Labour get in, we wait until they make a mess of it (3 day week, paying women to have children, letting in all the shite from around Europe and the world), then we vote Tory in.

The Tories get in, we wait until they make a mess of it (trying to wipe out northern folk, stupid taxes, privatise everything), then we vote Labour in.

Right then.

You're obviously as jaded by the whole shebang as I am, so what do we do?

We try and break up central government and give more power to Lancashire.

As the saying goes..... Britain's bread hangs by Lancashire thread.

It's just a pity it's not the 1800s. 

Devolution for Lancashire.....?

I like it!

We could build a big palace on Pendle Hill and issue anti-Yokshur edicts from there.

(Or would we have to form a coalition with them to stop Cheshire getting too uppity? Never mind - we'll work it out later.)

Ah.....but what about Blackburn?

Do they get full membership with voting rights and all that stuff?

Not sure I'm cool with that, if I'm honest - they're strange and not to be trusted.

Anyway, we could make the M61 a toll road and set up check points and rip off southern bastards who want to go to Botany Bay to buy poncey candles and shit.

Can I be in charge of pies?

Breadman wrote:Devolution for Lancashire.....?

I like it!

We could build a big palace on Pendle Hill and issue anti-Yokshur edicts from there.

(Or would we have to form a coalition with them to stop Cheshire getting too uppity? Never mind - we'll work it out later.)

Ah.....but what about Blackburn?

Do they get full membership with voting rights and all that stuff?

Not sure I'm cool with that, if I'm honest - they're strange and not to be trusted.

Anyway, we could make the M61 a toll road and set up check points and rip off southern bastards who want to go to Botany Bay to buy poncey candles and shit.

Can I be in charge of pies?

Surely you should be in charge of bread

Goes without saying.

I just started with a greedy opening gambit which included pies and then when I get knocked on that, I'm still Minister for Bread.

That's how politics works.

Bent as fuck.

Blackburn will be Lancashire's theme park. It'll be a bit like Disney World with the characters, but just a 100 times crappier. 

Southerners will only be allowed in if they agree to not speak. 

I've already voted in Lancashire's First Lady.......

Good god, I'm speechless!!!

What party is she?