Does an age difference matter in a relationship?

a guy at work asked me out the other day. he's 39 and i'm 23.

to be honest my reaction when he asked me was one of shock and i actually laughed. not because he's ugly or smelly or anything, i'd just never considered him as boyfriend material because he's nearer my dad's age.

i've turned him down, and while i've told other people I just don't fancy him the truth is I didn't feel comfortable dating an older man.

what are the boards feelings on this subject? anyone got any experience of dating someone much older or younger?

I once dated a woman 15 years older than me - I was 21 and she was 36. The sex was brilliant but we soon realised we wanted different things so we split.

I think my opportunities for dating significantly younger women has passed me by - unless I make a lot of money really soon and start wearing smoking jackets.

I am currently living with my girlfriend who is 20 years younger. She is still at University and we do spend quality time together, although she still has her own friends, whom I know and she knows my friends, and she still works, as well, most weekends. Been like this now for 7 months and everything is ok.



Saying that I do know someone, aged 64, going out with 27 year old woman and has been seeing her for the last 5 years and it seems to be going well.

Yeah its good for women to have sex with older men.

not-so-plain-jayne

Get on with it you selfish cow, make him happy.

I think everyone has a quick look when they see a couple with a few years between them, but it's pretty much acceptable these days.

The only problem a young woman like you faces Jayne is this 39 year old is unlikely to want children.

Age doesn't matter at all. If this 39 year old is the business give him a chance.

Jayne, I'm only 37...give me a chance! I still have most of my hair and I'm great at Scrabble.

Jayne with looks like yours I'm sure you could pick someone of your own age up.

Hipster_Nebula wrote:Jayne with looks like yours I'm sure you could pick someone of your own age up.

Oh right, so you believe it's Jayne in the avatar but not me?

And who the feck is that in your avatar?

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Hipster_Nebula wrote:Jayne with looks like yours I'm sure you could pick someone of your own age up.

Oh right, so you believe it's Jayne in the avatar but not me?

And who the feck is that in your avatar?

Thats me and my girlfriend.

And of course i believe it's Jayne, why would a beauty like that lie?

you on the other hand... dream on.

I think 23 and 39 would work out fine for dating and other stuff.

The problem would be 34 and 50 if it became a long term relationship.

I have a major problem with anyone aged about 22 or above targeting 16/17 year olds though. It just seems creepy to me, even though it's legal, to me 16/17 year olds are still very much kids.

Age is only a number, I'm 29 but feel fitter/healthier/happier than I did when I was 18.

Age is just a number. I'm 61 and have often felt like a 25 year-old. The wife says I'm not allowed one.
Seriously, I think that in jayne's case. this guy who is 39, is he single, divorced or what? Its not just his age but his circumstances that should be considered.

I noticed that Davy Jones wife was 34 and a real looker. He was only 66 when he died so perhaps she wore him out ?

I've had two relationships with women who were considerably younger each lasting 5 or 6 years and neither ended well because of the children thing. The first I fell madly in love with and for 6 years we were idyllically happy even though she was only 4 years older than my eldest son. It didn't seem to matter as she had a mature personality and everyone was cool about it. In the end the clock was ticking for her and I didn't want more kids and had the snip and from there it wasn't long before we decided to call it a day. I was gutted really, but she's happy now and is the mother of two girls and that's good enough for me, even though I still occasionally think it might have worked out differently.

The second was on the rebound from the first. She is only 16 years younger than me and she was/is a wonderful woman. One of the important things for me was that she said from the outset that she didn't want kids, but it was pretty obvious that she became increasingly nesty as she got into her 30s. No fault of hers, but I'd been there before so eventually I dumped her - which was harsh, but I felt I had to do it. She was pregnant within 2 months!

After that I ended up marrying again - my wife is only 4 years younger than me.

I think the only thing that is potentially problematic with dating someone considerably younger is that people of roughly the same age can go through the changes in perception that life brings much more easily than two people who are experiencing different age-related pressures. Ultimately it all comes down to the personalities involved.

Hipster_Nebula wrote:Thats me and my girlfriend.

Which one is you?

wanderlust wrote:I've had two relationships with women who were considerably younger each lasting 5 or 6 years and neither ended well because of the children thing. The first I fell madly in love with and for 6 years we were idyllically happy even though she was only 4 years older than my eldest son. It didn't seem to matter as she had a mature personality and everyone was cool about it. In the end the clock was ticking for her and I didn't want more kids and had the snip and from there it wasn't long before we decided to call it a day. I was gutted really, but she's happy now and is the mother of two girls and that's good enough for me, even though I still occasionally think it might have worked out differently.

The second was on the rebound from the first. She is only 16 years younger than me and she was/is a wonderful woman. One of the important things for me was that she said from the outset that she didn't want kids, but it was pretty obvious that she became increasingly nesty as she got into her 30s. No fault of hers, but I'd been there before so eventually I dumped her - which was harsh, but I felt I had to do it. She was pregnant within 2 months!

After that I ended up marrying again - my wife is only 4 years younger than me.

I think the only thing that is potentially problematic with dating someone considerably younger is that people of roughly the same age can go through the changes in perception that life brings much more easily than two people who are experiencing different age-related pressures. Ultimately it all comes down to the personalities involved.

that's a great answer wanderlust, thank you. when i first meet someone i'm not thinking marriage and babies but i guess if i date this fella you have to take those things into consideration because he may want them much sooner than I do.

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Hipster_Nebula wrote:Thats me and my girlfriend.

Which one is you?

oh har har