The Godawful Bolton News

Every now and then I go on the Bolton News site to see what's been going on in my beloved hometown. Then I remind myself not to bother again because its always doom and gloom and just makes me think ill of the place.


Here are the 5 'most popular' articles on there right now:

VIDEO: 'Mindless vandal' from Bolton sentenced for stoning tram and terrifying passengers.


Schoolgirl hit by car on her way home.


Blood-splattered Breightmet road leaves locals scared.


Bolton beauty hopes to be crowned Miss England after winning 'beach beauty' crown.



Children's see-saw damaged by vandals.




Is it really that bad these days or just that people prefer to read miserable shit like this over anything positive?

I want my Bolton back!

I quite agree Finlay, it's like the Wild West now!

"Schoolgirl hit by car on her way home."

This actually happened on my street. A few years ago the council thought it'd be clever to build a children's play area on a main road, knowing full well it attracts on a daily basis hundreds of absolute wankers doing ridiculous speeds. We have one of those things that measures your speed, and just either says "thank you" or "slow down" - obviously that's ever so helpful but how about a speed camera that actually gives out some sort of incentive to slow the fuck down. It's only a matter of time before it costs a child's life, but I think we'll have to wait for that to happen before anybody decides to do anything about it.

Now that that rant's over with, to answer your question, I do think Bolton is on its arse at present. I recently started following Bolton News on Facebook and it just seems to be one stabbing/twatting/mad car accident after another. There are so many utter twats on the road, so many loonies in general, it's fucking awful.

I walked into town a couple weeks ago during the day and within 10 minutes I'd overheard three separate conversations about violence.

"I just fuckin' said to him if he wants to get involved, he can just come over and I'll just fuckin' knock his teeth down his throat...."

"The thing is ye, what happens if you smack him one, and then you get done for GBH, and he just fuckin' gets away with it."

Blah blah blah.

The thing is I found myself feeling shocked about how not that shocked I was about this. I mean if you were from somewhere decent like Tunbridge Wells or Harrogate or Lemington Spa, this sort of thing would be a big deal - it would shock you to your core. In Bolton, it's just noise really, in fact you'd be more surprised if you went into town and you didn't witness at least one exchange of this nature.

Just remembered this