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BEHIND ENEMY LINES - WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS

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Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Here's the latest edition of Behind Enemy Lines. As you can imagine, the Wolves fans are very bitter and angry which made my job easier than normal.

Bullseye9 has a time machine:

3 wins out of 3 is about to become 4 wins out of 4 when we smash Bolton Wankerers back to 1975

molineuxmartin has anger issues:

I fucking hate Bolton and all who live and breed in her. Shitty place, shitty club, shitty ground, shitty players, shitty fans, shitty everything. Fuck Dougie Freeman, fuck Owen Coyle, fuck Fat Allardyce, fuck anyone who ever played or managed the cunts. I hope we kill the cunts, revive them, then kill them again. I hope we video it and send it to Harry Hill for £250. I'll spend the £250 on a hitman to take out Peter Kay the fat Bolton cunt. I hope we smash them on and off the pitch, I hope we invade the place and shag there daughters, fuck it I'll even shag their grannies. Let's take the cunts down!!!!!!!!

BillyWrightsLeftFoot has spent too much time with molineuxmartin:

Cunts, cunts, cunts, cunts, cunts, cunts, cunts. I would sacrifice my wife, my mother, my dog, my car, my house, my gay lover, my bank balance and my collection of Beanos to beat these twats on their own patch. Come on you Wolves, show the cunts who the one and only Wanderers are. Murder the twats!!!!!

Dozy_Debbie_Denn seems more sensible:

Bolton are invincible at home, best we can hope for is a draw. We'll be lucky to score in all honesty, I don't think they've conceded at home since early February.

Plasticman has a big future teaching English to schoolchildren:

fuck dem botlon wankers, we are wolves and we will kill you all today. cum on you goldin boyz

You don't want to meet Kenny1200's missus:

Tough one to call. One team has taken 9 points out of 9 and looks in great form, the other is a bunch of transvestites that play for the shitest town in the country and smell worse than my wife's knickers after our neighbour has licked her out. 3-1 Wolves.

SteveBullLegend09 still has nightmares about the 'Battle of Burnden':

Do it for 1997 boys, do it for everyone who witnessed that day of cheating by the wankers in white. Fuck McGinley and fuck Lofty the fucking Lion.

RaesRent isn't moving to Bolton anytime soon:

I hate Bolton. I've had to work there since 2009 when my office closed their Wolverhampton branch. Most Bolton people have never been outside the town, eat nothing but pasties, wear crop tops and short skirts despite being 20 stone, and think minimum wage is a long-term goal. Nothing would give me greater pleasure than beating these cunts.

WolvesPete adds to the McGinlay legend:

I was on holiday in America a few years back minding my own business when I saw some fat blonde twat walking towards me in a Bolton t-shirt. As he got closer to me I realised it was that fat bastard John McGinlay looking like a cross between Rick Waller and Chuck from The Goonies. My kids ran for cover. I was wearing my Wolves top and the fat cunt actually laughed at me as he walked by. Every day of my life since I have regretted letting him walk away, I should have battered the cunt.

TaraTrolleyDolly likes Dougie:

The two clubs were in a similar position a few months ago at the wrong end of the table. One team chose a young manager with a track record in this league, the other chose one with none. You reap what you sow.

Irwin56 misses SKD:

Why isn't that fat cunt Kevin Davies playing? I thought his place was written in stone? Gutted.

Is Notlob Hater Bolton Hater's cousin?:

I really hate these smug twats, they always seem to beat us. Today will be different, the team is in good form and on a roll. Victory today will put an end to Bolton's playoff hopes and push us into mid-table. Next season we will storm the league and Bolton will be £200m in debt. Fuck em.

JerryTheJam restrains himself:

How many years would I get for burning down the Reebok Stadium? I fucking hate this place. I'm sat here watching the Bolton players warm up and all I want to do is run on the pitch and punch every single one of the fuckers

TheChav69 should meet Kennster97:

fuck em up the ass!

molineuxmartin is back, lock your daughters and dogs up:

Come on you Golden Boys!!! Fuck the Bolton shite up, kill the cunts, shag their daughters, murder their mothers, eat their children, shag their dogs!! We can do this!

Mugsie views Bolton Nuts:

Been on various Bolton forums this morning and it's clear they expect a walkover. Amazing how many dickheads there are on these Bolton sites though, it seems the vast majority are aggressive cunts! God I hope we win this one, I think I hate Bolton even more than WBA.

The game kicks off and KennyMillersBiologicalDad is confident:

My brothers just text me and says the fans are really up for this one and getting behind the boys. plenty of possession first couple of minutes, we're gonna win this one folks.

But David Ngog puts Bolton in front and the Wolves fans virtually crash the internet with abuse:

1-0 down already, FUCK OFF SAUNDERS YOU WELSH CUNT
Christ the lord, losing already. Learn to defend you wankers.
I don't cunting believe it. Neither does Victor.
Twats!
CUNTS
Shameful
League 1 here we come. Where is Scunthorpe exactly?
Saunders out, Welsh wankers out
My granny could have won that header. Soft bastards!!
Fucking skinny French wanker who scores once every fucking blue moon decides to score today. Fucking typical
Ngog fuck off back to Merseyside you scouse bastard
What time is Ant and Dec on?
Someone please send me Saunders head on a silver plate.
Players you leave now, my family in nigeria do better and they are over 100 years
Seriously, when are Ant and Dec on?
LEARN TO DEFEND YOU BLIND TWATS

Ngog's goal has major repercussions for Molineux1890's wife:

My sex life is ruined. I was wanking in the bathroom and when Bolton scored I was at the point of no return. In future whenever I'm having sex I'll think of Bolton and Mr Floppy will appear quicker than an Albion fan at a free pies event.

ArtysParty blames the French:

How did that froggy bag of bones get so much room? Let's invade Paris.

BigBen12 has the answer for frustration:

I've just smacked the wife. She's lucky to have me.

Being 1-0 down has done nothing for molineuxmartin's mood:

Fuck off you cunts, I don't ever remember being quite so pissed off, not even when my wife noshed on my brothers knob at my 40th birthday party. Fuck off Deano you sheep shagging cunt

But it gets worse for the Wolves faithful, Alonso puts Bolton 2-0 up:

Two-nil Bolton, we are fucked
Let's just drive straight to League 1 now
Cunting cunts
Is Ant and Dec even on?
Same old Wanderers, can't defend when under pressure
I iz angry. mi girl is angry so iz me auntie kelly
I'm out on the ledge, I swear I'll jump Saunders if you don't sort it out
I just shat my kecks
My dick could defend better than these twats
Game over after 10 minutes, might as well have a wank
Bolton all over us, gonna be a hammering
Notlob to good for us
Cunts!
Someone fashion me a knife out of a toothbrush so I can place it between the Welsh wankers ribs
I've found Scunthorpe on the map, now to find Carlisle

PaulMorley21 has a depressing story to tell:

I work hard all week in a shit job for peanuts, still live with my folks at 35, haven't had sex since 2008 or a girlfriend since 2006, my friends have all left for bigger and better things, my car needs a new gearbox, the bloke across the road wants to kick my head in, and the newsagent keeps hassling me for payment for porn mags. Despite all that I'm still happy on a Saturday when I know the boys are playing and I can get all excited. 15 minutes in and it's game over. Before you know it I'll be back at work, sleeping in my parents en-suite, masturbating to unpaid copies of Mayfair and crying myself to sleep because Mary-Anne left me in 2006 because I "wasn't the one". Thanks WWFC.

FannyLover knows how to stop Bolton:

im about 30 yards from the Bolton fans. you'd think theyd just won the league the way they are dancing and kissing each other. Can someone on the site ring in a fake bomb alert please.

molineuxmartin has seen enough:

Right that's it, I'm off to Bolton, will be there in two hours if I put my foot down. I'm going to shag everything that moves, nah fuck it, I'll shag everything even if it's dead. Then I'll piss on everyone in the shithole and drive back to the homelands. Fuck Bolton.

SoundTim14 could almost be a Bolton fan:

I really thought today was going to be our day, but Bolton have bought wisely and in Spearing and Dawson they have two PL players. Two more than us. The appointment of Freedman has also been a masterstroke by the Bolton board, he did well with Palace and is doing it again. Take note Steve Morgan

The game ends and the Wolves fans are left to reflect on another defeat at the hands of Bolton. GarryGitter is quite philosophical:

Cunts. This is the end of Wolverhapton Wanderers. Enjoy today because the future holds nothing but the oblivion to shite. In 10 years time a visit to Bolton will sound like a trip to a Caribbean island with 100 fit virgins just waiting to suck you off. The end.

Rock solid? Thanks RedHillMob, we don't hear that very often!:

Bolton too good from the start. Lucky not to get hammered. If they make the play-offs they'll win them. Their defence looked rock solid.

Bully4Ever knows who is to blame:

Does anyone have the players addresses? I want to send them a card. Smeared in my shit.

No one go for dinner with JackTheCad_08:

I've never seen a Bolton team outplay us like that, what a fucking shambles. Does it get any worse than this? Yes it does, I now have to go to dinner with the inlaws and my irritating brother-in-law who farts all through the meal.

TimHenwoman decides to end it all:

Worst day of my life. This is my last post ever. Thanks for the memories. Please tell my mother it was Dean Saunders fault.

Don't expect to see HarryBishop567 again in a hurry:

I truly despise Bolton and it's population. The cunts were openly mocking us as we left, I've never witnessed that before. How did this happen? Who is to blame? One silver lining of going down again will be never having to come here again.

JerimiahJack loves Dougie long time:

It's quite simple, Bolton were very good and we were clueless. Credit Freeman for what he's done at Bolton, we should have gone for him ourselves.

0909090909 is a fan of our back 4:

We wouldn't have scored if we'd played all day. Too good at the back for us. Back to the drawing board Deano

I feel sorry for BarryBackrub31:

My fat fuck of a girlfriend supports Bolton. She sent me a text at half-time that said "2-0 you daft cunt". I went fucking mental and had to be restrained by some gorilla in an orange coat. I called him a fat twat and said I was going to shag his mother which got me ejected from the ground. Spent the rest of the game walking round the ground shouting at people like a complete loon. And despite leaving for the coach 45 minutes early I still managed to miss it 'cause I was abusing some people in Asda. So here I am at Bolton train station waiting for a train that will never come. Keep watching Sky News folks, I'm going to murder that fat bitch when I get home. And it won't be pretty.

NickFazer

NickFazer
El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf
Great stuff. Thought they would be used to losing to us by now though. Very Happy

scottjames30

scottjames30
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Funny stuff.

Keegan

Keegan
Moderator
Moderator
I'd buy PaulMorley21 a beer, the poor sod. Great read, Natasha - a number of lol moments!

https://forum.boltonnuts.co.uk

aaron_bwfc

aaron_bwfc
Moderator
Moderator
Brilliant stuff as usual, I feel sorry for BarryBackrub31 having to go to bolton train station..poor bastard.

Michael Bolton

Michael Bolton
El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf
Such an awesome post Nat!

BoltonTillIDie

BoltonTillIDie
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Very good Nat!

Chadders17


David Ngog
David Ngog
Love these posts great work going to bed happier knowing there are wolves fans miserable

scottjames30

scottjames30
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
I love reading this tbh.

Sgt. Bash

Sgt. Bash
Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Funniest one yet! Great feature of the site this, well done Tash.

lol! :biggrin: :rofl:

bwfc71

bwfc71
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo
That first poster got it right - Bolton town centre is a shit-hole and the only decent thing in the town centre are the roads out of it! But apart from classic!!!

Banks of the Croal

Banks of the Croal
Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
Brilliant Nat

BarryBackrub31...great stuff and user name.

Boggersbelief

Boggersbelief
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Top stuff Whittam.

Triumph


Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly
These get better, great stuff Natasha

Soul Kitchen

Soul Kitchen
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo
Very Happy

xmiles

xmiles
Youri Djorkaeff
Youri Djorkaeff
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] wrote:Brilliant stuff as usual, I feel sorry for BarryBackrub31 having to go to bolton train station..poor bastard.

I feel sorry for his girlfriend (assuming she isn't just a figment of his imagination).

gloswhite

gloswhite
Jay Jay Okocha
Jay Jay Okocha
Never liked the Wolves fans, but didn't realise they could be so articulate Very Happy. Yet another good post Nat. Keep em coming.

wanderlust


Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Excellent as usual. Particularly impressed by SJM still openly laughing at Wolves fans in the States after all these years. You should post this on the Baggies site - they'd appreciate it.

observer


Andy Walker
Andy Walker
5 more wins before the playoffs could keep Natasha very busy... and us very entertained!

Hipster_Nebula

Hipster_Nebula
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
always a lot of murder mentioned in these isn't there.

Very unusual.

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] wrote:always a lot of murder mentioned in these isn't there.

Very unusual.

You're welcome to do the next one.

Hipster_Nebula

Hipster_Nebula
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] wrote:
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] wrote:always a lot of murder mentioned in these isn't there.

Very unusual.

You're welcome to do the next one.

Nah i do twitter watch.

Bernard Dennis Park

Bernard Dennis Park
El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf
I was wearing my Wolves top and the fat cunt actually laughed at me as he walked by Laughing

mark leach

mark leach
Andy Walker
Andy Walker
Hilarious.

Floridian Orange

Floridian Orange
David Ngog
David Ngog
I do not find this funny in the slightest.

Disgusted of the USA

Floridian Orange

Floridian Orange
David Ngog
David Ngog
Even more galling is to have a picture of Karl Henry as my avatar. How does one change it?

Floridian Orange

Floridian Orange
David Ngog
David Ngog
The idiot is still on there, but at least the greatest nation on earth is being proudly represented. You lot would be watching German football if it wasn't for me and my brave countrymen.

AuntyHerbert

AuntyHerbert
David Ngog
David Ngog
Sleep

wanderlust


Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] wrote:The idiot is still on there, but at least the greatest nation on earth is being proudly represented. You lot would be watching German football if it wasn't for me and my brave countrymen.
I had a double take there as I couldn't immediately recognise a reference to the role of the colonies in the second world war. Well we've repaid that debt a hundred times over both financially and culturally. Fortunately, the Saudis haven't called in their debt as yet, so the USA limps on for now, albeit as the poorest country in the world.

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
This thread has taken a direction I wasn't expecting.

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