I was, therefore, forced to visit an establishment called "Tesco" in search of my healthy snacks, perhaps you have heard of it. What a place! Absolutely full of "larger than life" people stuffing trollies with chocolate and lager. I felt like a common person. Is this how you lot live?
Anyway, I also noticed a worrying new trend for twats aged 16-25 to wear their jeans/trousers halfway down their arses, exposing their keks. A fucking disgrace. And people were just wandering around as if there weren't a load of youths showing the world their arse cracks.
I complained immediately to the manager who at first tried to pass it off as "fashion" but after I threatened to get the press involved he asked his security guards to ask these wankers to pull up their pants. The look of embarrassment on their faces was almost worth having to rub shoulders with common folk.
Is this normal for the youth of today? Are Aaron, Boggers & Doffcocker sat at their PCs with their knobs hanging out?
The world has gone mad.