What can you invent?

A doorstep ejector, then when anyone comes mithering you just press your remote control button and Woosh they're launched into space 

I think it's time to examine things fairly deeply when you're discussing the finer points of your feces on a football forum.

vile.

Hipster_Nebula wrote:I think it's time to examine things fairly deeply when you're discussing the finer points of your feces on a football forum.

vile.

+1

Hipster_Nebula wrote:I think it's time to examine things fairly deeply when you're discussing the finer points of your feces on a football forum.

vile.

It's faeces. Stools sounds a lot better and is much easier to spell.

A device that can give me the body of a nubile 19 year old girl.

Or access to one.

Reebok Trotter wrote:

Hipster_Nebula wrote:I think it's time to examine things fairly deeply when you're discussing the finer points of your feces on a football forum.

vile.

It's faeces.  Stools sounds a lot better and is much easier to spell.

It can be spelt both ways.

Angry Dad wrote:Next time i get one i'll name it nobula in honour of Hipster, every time i see him post i'll think of one.

A winnit named Hipster Nebula, all sounds very solar system and planetary, still much better than plain old muck button I suppose!

Hipster_Nebula wrote:I think it's time to examine things fairly deeply when you're discussing the finer points of your feces on a football forum.

vile.

You precious thing, you are too nice for this awful world.

Soul Kitchen wrote:

Angry Dad wrote:Next time i get one i'll name it nobula in honour of Hipster, every time i see him post i'll think of one.

A winnit named Hipster Nebula,  all sounds very solar system and planetary,  still much better than plain old muck button I suppose!

winnit and muck button , you just gone to the top of my charts poor old hipster i fear he wont make it through the night.

Angry Dad wrote:

Hipster_Nebula wrote:I think it's time to examine things fairly deeply when you're discussing the finer points of your feces on a football forum.

vile.

You precious thing, you are too nice for this awful world.

No, just not keen reading about the finer details of someones rectum.

I suspect I'm not alone.

It's definitely the bottom of my want to read list.

On a lighter note a hammer that doesn't hit your thumb.

xmiles wrote:Biggie was this idea inspired by the car periscope episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm?

I'm afraid it was not. But I am curious. I have never seen curb... What happened in it to make you think that it was?

Mountainside...Dial a breakfast. You go on your smart phone, tell it what you fancy for breakfast and press go. The phone automatically pays for breakfast and auto transmits your location to the drone that flies in to deliver it no matter where you are.

Oh wait, it already exists.

Pizza ice cream.

Pizza on the go is messy.
So make the pizza base dough shaped like an ice cream cone. Top with tomato paste inside, fill with melted cheese and pepperoni etc. Yum!

Let me guess I bet you never came in your best mates back door and surprised him after school either!!
Hipster.

Oh I got a real one.

You know those 3d virtual reality headset things...

Instead of having a whole headset to buy, why not just a wear on the head dock to slip your smart phone horizontally into and that can be your screen and processor. Your smartphone can also use its orientation info and location to smartly understand your surroundings to overlay AR stuff?

A games console lock.
Parents put the kids console in a special unit. The unit is attached to a bike/treadmill etc - it will only allow the console to be turned on after a certain amount of exercise has been done. 

You could do it as 10 min treadmill = 1 hour gameplay
or if you're feeling harsh 10 min treadmill = 10 min gameplay
or you could do it based on energy. So the power generated by using the bike or rowing machine is used to power the console so you can only play as much as you  are prepared to work hard.

A winner for fat kids.

Maybe we should have a similar thing for Bolton Nuts. 10 mins running = 10 mins allowed on Bolton Nuts?

Free satnav for all?

Google, or someone could bring out a free satnav, who would say no to that?

It could be paid by targeted ads.

For example, to get the free satnav users would be served ads which they can subscribe to have removed. Or they would get ads coming through from local businesses based on their personal preferences... 

so if the sat nave has noticed you have been to a macdonalds drive through a few times in the last month it will say...

"Natasha, it's 12 o clock. Are you hungry? You are 6 minutes from your nearest macdonalds, would you like me to show you the way?"

Or when your MOT is due it points out the best local deals for MOTS.

Or it says, "you have not been to a car wash in 3 weeks, your route today passes the big wash, would you like me to alert you" - and so on.

The list of opportunities is endless. It would know your route to work, how often you go to the gym, what time of day you drive, what you do at weekends, which stadium you park at for the football and so on...

Companies would pay a fortune to have something like that in everyone's car. Look how much it costs to advertise on radio.

Good idea Biggie, but look how much info you are giving away. Do you really want a company to not only glean all your personal info from your PC, but also know where you are, where you have been, and learn all your preferences, etc? Big Brother is no different, just because its a private company rather than a government, you still lose all your privacy, and in this case you are inviting even more intrusion into your life.

Something I thought of years ago, is a car parking aid. When a car pulls level with a parking space, why not have 4 small wheels come down, raise the car slightly, and then move it sideways, into the space. I'm sure with todays technology, the control of the sideways movement and spacing between kerb, and front and rear cars, could be sorted out.