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Farts in the bath

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1Farts in the bath Empty Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 20:16

Guest


Guest
I finished up working late last night, so I grabbed a kebab on the way home for my tea.

I had beans on toast for breakfast today and cabbage with my tea, so you can imagine what my exhaust gasses are currently like.

Almost chewy.

Anyway, I've just been for a bath and I let one rip in the tub.

And it smelt brilliant.

Mrs B came half-way up the stairs then shouted "Good God, Man!" before doing an about-face and running back downstairs and straight out through the front door. (Soft cow.)

Anybody know why they always smell better in the bath?

2Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 20:59

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
A new low for Bolton Nuts.

3Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 21:04

Guest


Guest
I'll take that.

Thank you.

4Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 21:52

Sluffy

Sluffy
Admin
Magoo once started a thread on finding a grey pube but I don't think we've ever opened a topic on flatulence before nor the refining of our methane bottom pops through the use of H20 (and possibly a bit of detol or do you prefer the wifes bubbles) via the bath.

We all do it, apparently 8 to 20 farts a day is normal.

I think the family dog takes the blame for many of these though!

5Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 22:02

gloswhite

gloswhite
Jay Jay Okocha
Jay Jay Okocha
Bloody hell Sluffy, dont tell me you let the dog bath with the family ?  Very Happy

6Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 22:10

Angry Dad

Angry Dad
Youri Djorkaeff
Youri Djorkaeff
cat farts are real bad

7Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 22:15

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Don't know why they smell so good Breadman,but the sounds are produced by vibrations of the anal opening. Sounds depend on the velocity of expulsion of the gas and the tightness of the sphincter muscles of the anus.Looks like you have a sphincter bordering on military hardware. Be proud.:zzz:

8Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Oct 30 2013, 23:45

karlypants

karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Off topic slightly, I am terrible on a Saturday morning having been in the pub the night before, I can fart forever.  Dropping my back does help though.

I changed from lager to that green king IPA and it curbed it for a bit but back to normal.

The missus just looks at me with disgust now when I fart in bed, I used to use the excuse that it kept the bed warm but I think that excuse has worn a bit thin now Laughing

9Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Thu Oct 31 2013, 07:33

rammywhite

rammywhite
Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
@Sluffy wrote:Magoo once started a thread on finding a grey pube but I don't think we've ever opened a topic on flatulence before nor the refining of our methane bottom pops through the use of H20 (and possibly a bit of detol or do you prefer the wifes bubbles) via the bath.

We all do it, apparently 8 to 20 farts a day is normal.

I think the family dog takes the blame for many of these though!
8 to 20 a day!!.
Bloody hell - it's only half past seven and I've already got through my quota for the day. Am I barred from letting rip for the rest of the day?

10Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Thu Oct 31 2013, 09:09

Reebok_Rebel

Reebok_Rebel
Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
Breadman wrote:

Anyway, I've just been for a bath and I let one rip in the tub.

And it smelt brilliant.

This is like the funniest post ive read in a long time, ive just spat my croissant all over my monitor and keyboard... Good job its just me in the office this morning! 

You are right though. I very rarely have a bath these days, I prefer a shower, but they do smell better. 

On the subject of farting in the bath, my son did it last night, He then proceeded to have a good giggle and informed me "I really like pumping daddy!"

11Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Thu Oct 31 2013, 12:19

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Durham University has a fart lighting society.

12Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Thu Oct 31 2013, 12:20

karlypants

karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
@boltonbonce wrote:Durham University has a fart lighting society.
I'm surprised after all this health and safety bollocks these days! Very Happy

13Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Thu Oct 31 2013, 12:33

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Google 'fart soundboard' it's a blast.

14Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue May 31 2016, 15:30

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Thought I'd bring back an old thread started by our most intelligent poster.

There are still things to be said on this subject.

15Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue May 31 2016, 21:03

Fabians Right Peg

Fabians Right Peg
Andy Walker
Andy Walker
As I wasn't around at the time to answer, glad this was revised. Having given the question some considerable thought, given that water is denser than air I can only assume that the rate of diffusion is slowed allowing the expelled gas to concentrate in the bubble.

As the gas becomes more concentrated the pressure builds bursting the bubble, the gasses then diffuse giving the recipient a concentrated dose of the released gasses.

16Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue May 31 2016, 21:06

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Brilliant.

We need more posters like this. We're actually learning something.

17Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue May 31 2016, 21:11

karlypants

karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
Fabian should have the title of Nuts Best scientist 2016! Very Happy

18Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue May 31 2016, 21:12

Guest


Guest
See, if you wait long enough somebody will eventually come up with the goods.

Now if we could just find out the answer to:

Bruce Forsyth - Why?

19Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue May 31 2016, 21:17

scottjames30

scottjames30
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
The day the forum died .

20Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Jun 01 2016, 05:57

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
@boltonbonce wrote:Thought I'd bring back an old thread started by our most intelligent poster.

There are still things to be said on this subject.

The fart is a tiny explosion,
It comes from the planet Bum,
It whistles through arsehole canyon,
and explodes with a musical hum.

21Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Jun 01 2016, 09:42

whatsgoingon

whatsgoingon
Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
I think the reason the smell is better is because it all gets concentarated into a bubble and when the bubble pops the smell is concentrated like the popping of a nitrous oxide capsule, usually in an area right in front of the nose. Whereas a more traditional fart, other than in bed is distributed far and wide and you're lucky if you get a whiff.

Edit-Sorry Fabian missed your earlier post.

22Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Tue Jun 05 2018, 23:14

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
I think twitter used to have an Anti Fart Society.

23Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Jun 06 2018, 17:13

rammywhite

rammywhite
Frank Worthington
Frank Worthington
Its what I constantly tell my missus- its not the first kiss that matters, its the first fart and n particular who dropped it.
it really moulds a relationship forever.

24Farts in the bath Empty Re: Farts in the bath on Wed Jun 06 2018, 17:31

wanderlust


Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse
@rammywhite wrote:
@Sluffy wrote:Magoo once started a thread on finding a grey pube but I don't think we've ever opened a topic on flatulence before nor the refining of our methane bottom pops through the use of H20 (and possibly a bit of detol or do you prefer the wifes bubbles) via the bath.

We all do it, apparently 8 to 20 farts a day is normal.

I think the family dog takes the blame for many of these though!
8 to 20 a day!!.
Bloody hell - it's only half past seven and I've already got through my quota for the day. Am I barred from letting rip for the rest of the day?
Lost vocation as Le Petomane 2.

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