Return to sender.
Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here
+9
Sluffy
gloswhite
Hipster_Nebula
chipbutty
xmiles
Angry Dad
Dunkels King
largehat
Copper Dragon
13 posters
Go to page : 1, 2, 3
21 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:51 pm
Copper Dragon
Ivan Campo
22 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:51 pm
Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
I'm not taking you one. Your reputation precedes you!
Last edited by Reebok Trotter on Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
24 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:55 pm
Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
The post is not meant to be taken SERIOUSLY FFS.
25 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:58 pm
Guest
Guest
several times in my life ive found myself short of food or miles from a food sauce and have had to skin a cat and eat it. lovely with a nice salad.
26 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:00 pm
Hipster_Nebula
Nat Lofthouse
27 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:02 pm
Copper Dragon
Ivan Campo
Reebok Trotter wrote:I'm not taking you one. Your reputation precedes you!
Well I'm really rather shocked, I didn't know that I had a reputation.
I believe that you and I have the same sort of humour but you are more refined in delivering it.
I actually prefer Semolina pudding but it just doesn't have the brain bits in it.
28 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:09 pm
Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Your reputation is of a humorous nature.
What you may find surprising is that alphabet soup can be quite palatable once you get past the original scepticism. The beauty of the soup is that you can arrange the letters yourself depending on your grammatical capabilities.
What you may find surprising is that alphabet soup can be quite palatable once you get past the original scepticism. The beauty of the soup is that you can arrange the letters yourself depending on your grammatical capabilities.
29 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:19 pm
Banks of the Croal
Frank Worthington
I like Cats, but they do have some bad habits, like Shitting in my Garden.
A few years ago a Cat and it's Kitten turned up at my back garden , i sensed it was homeless so fed them and gave them Shelter, then one day the kitten disappeared altogether, i decided to ring the local cat sanctuary about the mother, they came ,said they would look out for a home for it and in the meantime would we mind looking after it, which we did.
Anyway time went by, it started bringing Mice, Rats into our house , sometimes they were still alive.
But the worst was, i'd be pottering about in the back Garden and there would be this awful smell, so i'd search it out guided by the flies ,i'd find the source.
A Maggot ridden dead Bird, turned my Stomach over.
A few years ago a Cat and it's Kitten turned up at my back garden , i sensed it was homeless so fed them and gave them Shelter, then one day the kitten disappeared altogether, i decided to ring the local cat sanctuary about the mother, they came ,said they would look out for a home for it and in the meantime would we mind looking after it, which we did.
Anyway time went by, it started bringing Mice, Rats into our house , sometimes they were still alive.
But the worst was, i'd be pottering about in the back Garden and there would be this awful smell, so i'd search it out guided by the flies ,i'd find the source.
A Maggot ridden dead Bird, turned my Stomach over.
Last edited by Banks of the Croal on Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
30 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:22 pm
Copper Dragon
Ivan Campo
A scale of 1 to 10 then Reebok Trotter........
http://boards.footymad.net/forum.php?tno=479&fid=224&sty=2&act=1&mid=2114888292
http://boards.footymad.net/forum.php?tno=479&fid=224&sty=2&act=1&mid=2114888292
31 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 6:22 am
Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Copper Dragon wrote:A scale of 1 to 10 then Reebok Trotter........
http://boards.footymad.net/forum.php?tno=479&fid=224&sty=2&act=1&mid=2114888292
I like it.
32 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 12:08 pm
gloswhite
Guðni Bergsson
Cats attempt to cover their mess, but don't make a big effort in doing so, leaving it lying wherever they go. This includes, flower beds, areas with bark (including kids play areas), lawns, and even chippings. I was once told that placing a half full bottle of water in the middle of the lawn unnerves cats and they go elsewhere. Didn't try it. Also told that they don't like the smell of creosote. I find one of those big water pistols or a tennis ball is far more effective, but wouldn't hurt them. (were currently looking after my daughters cat, but doubt I would want one myself).
33 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 12:13 pm
gloswhite
Guðni Bergsson
I can't believe I've taken a day off work, and am actually sitting here, discussing cat shit !
34 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 12:21 pm
Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Meaow!!!!
35 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 12:24 pm
gloswhite
Guðni Bergsson
Off to Halifax Bldg Socy to see why my mortgage has gone up by £443 per month, instead of £20. (one would hope its an error !) bi 4 nw
36 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 2:57 pm
wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
A mate of mine had a flat with his GF by Aberdeen fish market in the 70's. Bit sick my mate. Market swamped with packs of huge wild tom cats that lived off the fish waste. Some of them must have been 3 ft long. He amused himself by getting caned and shooting them in the ass from his flat window with a little air rifle. After a while they started to stay away from his flat for obvious reasons. His GF wanted a cat so he persuaded her to get a prissy little queen that was very cute TBF. It was a long haired tortoiseshell with a velvet collar and and a tinkly bell and crapped in a litter tray in the bathroom.
Went to visit him one weekend and on the Saturday his GF had to go to see her folks so we were left to our own devices. Got back from the pub about 4 pm and mate dropped kitty off the balcony (1st floor) and never having been out on its own before sat there staring up and meeowing loudly.
Which attracted rather a large group of market toms.
Fights broke out as poor kitty was gangbanged relentlessly for the next half hour or so by the huge tomcats, much to sicko mate's amusement. Getting bored with this, he produced the air rifle and shot a huge ginger thing in the dangly nuts just as he was rogering kitty senseless, propelling them both 3 feet forward. Ginger thing pulled out and legged it. After a couple more big boys had their way with kitty and had got shot in the ass for their troubles, the toms worked out that a considerable amount of pain accompanies this particular pleasure and backed off.
Mate went downstairs and collected the heavily dishevelled kitty.
That evening GF frequently commented on kitty's meowing and incessant bit licking and mate suggested she was in season so they should take extra care to ensure she doesn't get out. Litter of disproportionately huge kittens arrived not long after.
Went to visit him one weekend and on the Saturday his GF had to go to see her folks so we were left to our own devices. Got back from the pub about 4 pm and mate dropped kitty off the balcony (1st floor) and never having been out on its own before sat there staring up and meeowing loudly.
Which attracted rather a large group of market toms.
Fights broke out as poor kitty was gangbanged relentlessly for the next half hour or so by the huge tomcats, much to sicko mate's amusement. Getting bored with this, he produced the air rifle and shot a huge ginger thing in the dangly nuts just as he was rogering kitty senseless, propelling them both 3 feet forward. Ginger thing pulled out and legged it. After a couple more big boys had their way with kitty and had got shot in the ass for their troubles, the toms worked out that a considerable amount of pain accompanies this particular pleasure and backed off.
Mate went downstairs and collected the heavily dishevelled kitty.
That evening GF frequently commented on kitty's meowing and incessant bit licking and mate suggested she was in season so they should take extra care to ensure she doesn't get out. Litter of disproportionately huge kittens arrived not long after.
37 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 2:59 pm
Hipster_Nebula
Nat Lofthouse
Look at this...
38 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 3:03 pm
wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
May have written about this before, but there was a family in Edgworth that didn't have running water (unusual even in the 1960s) but had a well out back. Mate's mum asked mate to get a bucket of water to drown some kittens which he fetched, and plonked on the kitchen floor by the fire. Mate then grabs bag of kittens and starts to insert them into the bucket at which point his mum stops him, and says "You can't drown kittens in that! It's stone cold!"
Made him warm up the water on the fire until it was lukewarm. Then she drowned the kittens in it.
Go figure.
Made him warm up the water on the fire until it was lukewarm. Then she drowned the kittens in it.
Go figure.
39 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 3:45 pm
largehat
Frank Worthington
Wanderlust, that story is awful. Your mate is a sick fuck. I hope wherever he is now, he is in a lot of pain.
40 Re: Look at me, I'm trying to be controversial here Fri Apr 27, 2012 3:49 pm
gloswhite
Guðni Bergsson
LH, I have to call your morals into judgement here. You don't like to hurt cats or animals, but you don't mind inflicting it on humans
Go to page : 1, 2, 3
Similar topics
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum