Bill and Koo

Bill and Koo are a couple of wood pigeons presently building a new home in a laburnum at Bobsworth Towers.

The couple have been visiting Bobsworth for several months recently perching every day on the pergola before displaying their affection for each other in the traditional way.

Another less welcome  visitor to the pergola is Ryan. Also a wood pigeon, Ryan seems intent on joining in Bill and Koo’s love making but the happy couple are having none of it.

Isn’t nature wonderful?

boltonbonce wrote:

That bird looks as stiff as a totem pole, Boncey.

As a veggie, I'm not advocating you put them in a pie, but it has to be an option, what with the price of meat.

Four and twenty blackbirds pie is supposed to be good (fit for a kind apparently) but I've never tried it myself.

Sluffy wrote:Four and twenty blackbirds pie is supposed to be good (fit for a kind apparently) but I've never tried it myself.

When the pie was opened
The birds began to sing;

Four and twenty's a lot though, isn't it, even for Ryan?

Do you think that a character reference from Sir Alex is going to help?

Wood pigeons are a damned plague. They shit everywhere and make a racket shagging outside my bedroom window at silly o'clock in the morning - and there's hundreds of the f*****s.

wanderlust wrote:Wood pigeons are a damned plague. They shit everywhere and make a racket shagging outside my bedroom window at silly o'clock in the morning - and there's hundreds of the f*****s.

Lusty seems to know more about wood pigeons than he does about business finance. I don’t mind Bill and Koo being active as long as it’s not near the house.

The jury have been given a bit more time to make up their minds about Ryan.

Another thing I don't like about wood pigeons is that the cat is always dragging in fledglings and squabs and torturing them in the dining room. Reluctantly I rescue them if they still alive enough to have a chance of survival, otherwise I have to ring their necks and hide the bodies in the bin. Mice are bad enough but the cat can make a real mess with a fledgling woody.

wanderlust wrote:Another thing I don't like about wood pigeons is that the cat is always dragging in fledglings and squabs and torturing them in the dining room. Reluctantly I rescue them if they still alive enough to have a chance of survival, otherwise I have to ring their necks and hide the bodies in the bin. Mice are bad enough but the cat can make a real mess with a fledgling woody.

Bloody cats. Horrible creatures. I might take up violin making.

boltonbonce wrote:
Bloody cats. Horrible creatures. I might take up violin making.

I love our cat and even excuse her doing what nature makes her do, especially as that now excludes crapping in the house since she discovered my neighbour's gravel drive.

She's more attached to the missus though, as she's the one who feeds her...

We've had cats, but I can't take seriously any creature that sits on the sideboard licking it's arse.

My dad only got away with it because he paid the rent.

boltonbonce wrote:We've had cats, but I can't take seriously any creature that sits on the sideboard licking it's arse.

My dad only got away with it because he paid the rent.

My daughter dumped her "Jug" (Jack Russell / Pug cross - or mongrel as I like to call it) on us on Sunday and it amused us for at least 5 minutes after it got stung on the arse, and tore around in circles trying to lick and/or scratch the arse it couldn't reach.
Missus wasn't amused when I suggested she might help the poor thing out with a wet finger.

Isn't it odd that when Lusty, Nuts' own wood pigeon expert in residence, disappears so do Bill and Koo?

There was no sign of them at Bobsworth yesterday, nor Randy Ryan.

I don't know about Bill and Koo but Ryan might have had 'business' in Manchester.

If it goes to re-trial might I suggest a Leeds or Liverpool jury. Once I might have suggested Bolton but there are too many Rags in the town these days. Where are 'the stocks' when you need them?

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11165839/Ryan-Giggs-friend-Gary-Neville-faces-contempt-court-action.html

Ten Bobsworth wrote:Isn't it odd that when Lusty, Nuts' own wood pigeon expert in residence, disappears so do Bill and Koo?

I didn't "disappear" - Sluffy banned me for the 6th time - a record I'm not proud of -  this time for allegedly "trolling" him which I believe is modern parlance for "taking the piss".
I don't think we'll ever see eye to eye TBH as our conversations tend to follow the same predictable pattern e.g.

(Sluffy) "Your sarcasm won't get you anywhere"
(Me) "You might say that but it got me to the finals of the 1998 World Sarcasm Cup held in Copenhagen"
(Sluffy) "Really?"
(Me) "No."

I guess we're just different

wanderlust wrote:Another thing I don't like about wood pigeons is that the cat is always dragging in fledglings and squabs and torturing them in the dining room. Reluctantly I rescue them if they still alive enough to have a chance of survival, otherwise I have to ring their necks and hide the bodies in the bin. Mice are bad enough but the cat can make a real mess with a fledgling woody.

See the episode of Frank Skinner's Room 101 in which Aisling Bea makes an impassioned case for consigning "the winged vermin" to the dreaded vault....

wanderlust wrote:
I didn't "disappear" - Sluffy banned me for the 6th time - a record I'm not proud of -  this time for allegedly "trolling" him which I believe is modern parlance for "taking the piss".
I don't think we'll ever see eye to eye TBH as our conversations tend to follow the same predictable pattern e.g.

(Sluffy) "Your sarcasm won't get you anywhere"
(Me) "You might say that but it got me to the finals of the 1998 World Sarcasm Cup held in Copenhagen"
(Sluffy) "Really?"
(Me) "No."

I guess we're just different

Don’t you think that you and Okocha might be missing the point of this little allegory , Lusty?

Ten Bobsworth wrote:

wanderlust wrote:
I didn't "disappear" - Sluffy banned me for the 6th time - a record I'm not proud of -  this time for allegedly "trolling" him which I believe is modern parlance for "taking the piss".
I don't think we'll ever see eye to eye TBH as our conversations tend to follow the same predictable pattern e.g.

(Sluffy) "Your sarcasm won't get you anywhere"
(Me) "You might say that but it got me to the finals of the 1998 World Sarcasm Cup held in Copenhagen"
(Sluffy) "Really?"
(Me) "No."

I guess we're just different

Don’t you think that you and Okocha might be missing the point of this little allegory , Lusty?

He's too fixated with having another little pop at me again Bob, more than anything else.  He had another tiny go at me on the match thread also - so nothing much has changed from him, just held back for the time being.

He (and a few others off here also) don't seem to understand the definition of trolling in internet terms, which is posting things for the purpose of seeking a response.

He admits openly he was posting to take the piss out of me - but he (and others!) didn't seem to care much for the response he then got and will now get in future.

Don't troll - don't get banned.

Not really difficult to understand is it...?

I trust we all know where we stand now.

I expect Bill and Koo will be interested to know whether Randy Ryan will face a re-trial. Its D-Day today apparently.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11187097/D-Day-Ryan-Giggs-waits-hear-CPS-try-claims-attacked-ex.html

So its a re-trial for Giggs then.

Even though I've little to no sympathy for Randy Ryan the Rag, I cant see much of a 'public interest' in a re-run of these tawdry proceedings.