Having targeted middle-aged slags last time out I quickly realised they are just as difficult as young slags. Considering most of them look like Keith Allen after a train crash you'd wouldn't think they'd be so fussy about condoms and STDs. But they are.
Luckily I found a new website full of sexy slags, www.grannyslags.co.uk, I wish I'd come here first. The site is crawling with pensioner slags who've had sex more times than I've shaved my back. I'm telling you, their snatches are wider than the holes in our back four when Zat Knight is playing.
As usual I swapped a few saucy e-mails and snaps with various granny slags and picked three to meet up with and shag. First up on Friday night was Dorothy:
Dorothy is 62, from Chorlton-cum-Hardy, and enjoys swimming, holidaying in Milan, and being spit-roasted by two men. As you can see from the pics, she is well hot for a 62 year old slag, no one would believe she has a bus pass. Her fanny was extremely welcoming, but it was weird having Derek (her 74 year old neighbour) stood over us while Dorothy sucked his cock.
On Saturday night I was lucky enough to meet up with Meg:
Meg is 66, from Gorton, and enjoys reading, gardening and being donkey punched (look it up). I've always loved Gorton slags, they are dirtier than the houses they live in, and Meg was no exception. The donkey punching took a bit of getting used to, but what man doesn't want to slap his slag around a bit? I could walk to her house which is always a bonus, I don't want to be wasting petrol on a Gorton slag.
Last night was my encounter with Beryl. Just look at this hottie:
Beryl is 70, from Audenshaw, and enjoys bingo, crosswords and fisting. Now I have to say I've never tried fisting before, how the fuck do you get a fist in some slags snatch? But I shouldn't have worried, Beryl could have fit every fist of the GB Olympic team up her fanny, it was so loose she'd parked her Mini in there. The sex was pretty good as well, so much so that the constant beeping of her pacemaker didn't bother me at all. Having sex with Beryl was a bit like throwing a sausage down a hallway, but she was happy to do bareback so I had no complaints.
So there we have it folks. Three top contenders, I really need your help to decide which granny slag to make the next Mrs Quent. Be quick, they might not be here for long.