HomeI Know one he's so bad he got knocked down by a milk float walking to hospital with an arm he broke by tripping up and falling through a glass coffee table then falling backwards over his first floor balcony into some rose bushes.
Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf
+3
boltonbonce
Natasha Whittam
Angry Dad
7 posters
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2 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Mon Mar 26 2018, 18:57
Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
When did you meet Bonce?
3 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Mon Mar 26 2018, 19:43
boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat has it just about right. This is our lounge.Natasha Whittam wrote:When did you meet Bonce?
4 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Tue Mar 27 2018, 12:11
wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
I had a mate at Uni in the 70s who was a walking disaster. Clumsy as f*** he broke everything he touched but the worst of it was he liked the bookies and lost money like there was no tomorrow. On the day he won £80 (a lot then) he was buying rounds at the pub rather than recognising that he was still £300 down for the term and had f*** all left to live on. Loved the guy but he was a total Jonah.
5 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Tue Mar 27 2018, 18:31
Angry Dad
Youri Djorkaeff
I had a BT engineer at my house who stapled his finger to the skirting board he was shouting for help when i got back from getting petrol. 
6 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Tue Mar 27 2018, 18:37
karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Angry Dad wrote:I had a BT engineer at my house who stapled his finger to the skirting board he was shouting for help when i got back from getting petrol.
7 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 10:32
boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Have I mentioned doing my back in on a trampoline?
I was confined to the settee yesterday, turned the TV on,and was confronted by Loose Women.
I then dropped the remote,couldn't reach it,and had to sit through the whole bloody hour,until someone came home and rescued me.
By which time of course,I'd also had to sit through David bloody Dickinson,and his Cuprinol soaked face,urging me to get on the phone for a chance to win £55,000.
I comforted myself with the thought that,at least I'd not had to put up with Nick Knowles.
I open the paper today,and,blow me,eight O'clock BBC1.......Bloody Nick Knowles!
If piles had a human face...........
I was confined to the settee yesterday, turned the TV on,and was confronted by Loose Women.
I then dropped the remote,couldn't reach it,and had to sit through the whole bloody hour,until someone came home and rescued me.
By which time of course,I'd also had to sit through David bloody Dickinson,and his Cuprinol soaked face,urging me to get on the phone for a chance to win £55,000.
I comforted myself with the thought that,at least I'd not had to put up with Nick Knowles.
I open the paper today,and,blow me,eight O'clock BBC1.......Bloody Nick Knowles!
If piles had a human face...........
8 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 10:54
Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Do us all a favour, accept that offer to go back to your old job.
Trust me, Mrs Bonce will be chuffed.
Trust me, Mrs Bonce will be chuffed.
9 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 11:10
boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Certainly not. Although I'd feel safer at work.Natasha Whittam wrote:Do us all a favour, accept that offer to go back to your old job.
Trust me, Mrs Bonce will be chuffed.
Retirement has given me ideas,and most of them involve walking. This, unfortunately, is usually the start of my problems.
This is Woolston Eyes,a place where I've spent many happy hours birdwatching. Due to work,I've not been for six years,but I'm intending to renew my permit next week.
The thing is,the dangers,for me,are plain to see. Do you see them? Do you? Really?
10 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 11:52
rammywhite
Frank Worthington
boltonbonce wrote:Certainly not. Although I'd feel safer at work.Natasha Whittam wrote:Do us all a favour, accept that offer to go back to your old job.
Trust me, Mrs Bonce will be chuffed.
Retirement has given me ideas,and most of them involve walking. This, unfortunately, is usually the start of my problems.
This is Woolston Eyes,a place where I've spent many happy hours birdwatching. Due to work,I've not been for six years,but I'm intending to renew my permit next week.
The thing is,the dangers,for me,are plain to see. Do you see them? Do you? Really?
Hello BB,
join Bolton's RSPB group and go there with them on April 28th (as well as many other good locations)
11 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 12:06
boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Cheers Rammy. Can't help thinking that would be like sailors shooting an albatross before setting out to sea!
12 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 12:08
rammywhite
Frank Worthington
boltonbonce wrote:Cheers Rammy. Can't help thinking that would be like sailors shooting an albatross before setting out to sea!
Not sure that I follow- was it a critical comment on Bolton RSPB?
13 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 13:10
boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
No. Killing an albatross is considered unlucky by sailors.rammywhite wrote:boltonbonce wrote:Cheers Rammy. Can't help thinking that would be like sailors shooting an albatross before setting out to sea!
Not sure that I follow- was it a critical comment on Bolton RSPB?
Having me around amounts to the same thing.
14 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 14:25
rammywhite
Frank Worthington
boltonbonce wrote:No. Killing an albatross is considered unlucky by sailors.rammywhite wrote:boltonbonce wrote:Cheers Rammy. Can't help thinking that would be like sailors shooting an albatross before setting out to sea!
Not sure that I follow- was it a critical comment on Bolton RSPB?
Having me around amounts to the same thing.
Got ya!! But you'd still be welcome to come along with the RSPB- there are only a few will go and they're good birders
15 Re: Does anyone know a real life unlucky Alf Wed Mar 28 2018, 15:09
Cajunboy
Frank Worthington
Boncey, please take care not to trip over your tripod.
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