The Apprentice 2012 Thread

On a similar subject, has anyone ever watched Come dine with me ? Most of the contestants who talk a good meal turn out to be bobbins at cooking. Quite a number of them are really only interested in showing everyone what a lovely home they own.

This weeks episode is set in Blackpool and one of the participants is a 48 year old Harridan who continually goes on about how beautiful she is! ( She isn't)

A recent medical survey reported that 40% of men over forty suffer from erection problems.

Looking at 40% of women over forty it really isn't difficult to see why.

I watched Come Dine With Me for a bit but it does start to get repetitive very quickly. Most of the contestants seem to be the usual pond life whose only interest is getting on TV. Most of them can't cook, some cheat, some of them score other contestants tactically in order to win and bizarrely some of them cook things they have never cooked before. The only redeeming feature is the commentary.

Don't you dare start talking Come Dine With Me bollocks on my Apprentice thread.

Okay, I will limit my observations just to the apprentice on here. You aren't the wench from Blackpool by any chance are you ?

I think they could liven up "The Apprentice" by making it more like a real apprenticeship. They'd take it a lot more seriously if they had their balls gloss painted on the first day or were sent out to buy a can of tartan paint and a tub of elbow grease.

Cocky Apprentice Twat: "I'm here Sir Alan, to demonstrate my all round business acumen underpinned by outstanding critical reasoning skills and strategic excellence"
Sir Alan: "The kettle plugs in to that socket in the corner lad and the biscuits are in the cupboard. Mine's white with two sugars and do a cappuccino for Margaret whilst you're at it."

It's perfect just the way it is. I can't wait to meet the contenders.

Natasha Whittam wrote:It's perfect just the way it is. I can't wait to meet the contenders.

It would be perfect if they were shot with a tranquilliser dart and surgically operated upon whilst they were sleeping instead of fired - just to up the ante a little bit. A direct correlation by the size of the loss in the tasks and the size of the body parts removed would definitely improve all round performance.

You sound very bitter. Did someone once pinch your great business idea?

I have lots of great business ideas and they are often ripped off. I've been "me-too'd" more times than I care to remember, but I tend to think imitation is flattery. I'll let you know when my current project/"next big thing" is launched (est 10 to 12 weeks)

wanderlust wrote:

Natasha Whittam wrote:It's perfect just the way it is. I can't wait to meet the contenders.

It would be perfect if they were shot with a tranquilliser dart and surgically operated upon whilst they were sleeping instead of fired - just to up the ante a little bit. A direct correlation by the size of the loss in the tasks and the size of the body parts removed would definitely improve all round performance.

I like Wanderlusts idea. Perhaps the contenders who get fired could be banished to live in that Chilean mine that collapsed ? They could be fired down that tube and left to live on their wits until the show ended. Now wouldn't that be something ?

...and then when the winner is picked (s)he gets to enter the collapsed mine with the weapons of his/her choice and finish off all the contenders that had wound up/slagged off him/her during the game - a sort of Running Man finale broadcast live from the mine.
Now that would do wonders for the ratings.

Your first look at the new contenders:





I love them already!

I could guarantee the young miss in the little black dress at the end, a fun-filled and frenetic 5 minutes she wouldn't forget in a hurry.

The tall one in the middle for me, she looks like she'd be happy to dominate a session of breathless passion.

She looks like she'd get the leather tights on and beat your ass.

Hipster_Nebula wrote:The tall one in the middle for me, she looks like she'd be happy to dominate a session of breathless passion.

Beats that cardboard cut-out hands down. looks can be deceiving so let us wait until they expose their flaws on camera.

Profiles of the candidates with Video Tapes....

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p00pj01n/candidates

Tonight's the night folks. 9pm BBC1.

I've already bought my bag of Monster Munch and 2 litre bottle of Pepsi. It's going to be a great evening.

Interesting that the criterion for being a successful businesswoman has shifted to "shagability" on this forum.
BTW ... 5 minutes?
Romance clearly isn't dead.

I've got some tins of Thwaites mild at the ready. Can't wait to see which business whizz kid makes a total ponce of themselves.