Are You Better Than Zat Knight?

Bolton are shite. The players are no better than average pub league players. They've made it so far due to pushy parents, having money, and pure luck.

Be honest, if you had access to the facilities available to Zat Knight (fitness coaches, dietitians, top football coaches etc) wouldn't you be better than he is? If you were in tip-top condition wouldn't you have more to offer than Knight and the other ponces?

Surely the way to bring this debt down is to get rid of all the players as their contracts end and replace them with the best 20 fans. Surely from the thousands of Bolton fans around the country we can find 20 or so who are decent.

Imagine the passion on the pitch with a team made up of Bolton fans born in the town itself. It'd be like having 11 Nicky Hunt's on the pitch.

I'm probably not eligible to play being a girl with wonky tits, but even I am better than Zat Knight. I wouldn't have gifted those goals to Middlesbrough, and I'd probably have scored at least two goals myself.

So could you be better than Zat Knight given the right resources?

I'm going to have to rule myself out of this one because I don't understand how Twitter works, and you can't be a professional footballer if you can't tweet, can you?

Probably not, I'm more of a Messi type player

Breadman wrote:I'm going to have to rule myself out of this one because I don't understand how Twitter works, and you can't be a professional footballer if you can't tweet, can you?

There will be no Twittering under the new regime. You can have a trial if you like.

Boggersbelief wrote:Probably not, I'm more of a Messi type player

I'm looking for players for all positions. There's room for a Messi type player in the new BWFC.

Sign me up

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Breadman wrote:I'm going to have to rule myself out of this one because I don't understand how Twitter works, and you can't be a professional footballer if you can't tweet, can you?

There will be no Twittering under the new regime. You can have a trial if you like.

What about spit-roasting under-age girls in hotel rooms with four of your mates?

Not sure I'm up for that, if I'm honest.....

Breadman wrote:

What about spit-roasting under-age girls in hotel rooms with four of your mates?

Not sure I'm up for that, if I'm honest.....

Magoo, Scott, Karly Pants & Culcheth White have already got that covered.

I'll play. I'm a wizard of the wing. I have the pace of a top class sprinter and the physique of a rugby league forward.I'd score at least 20 goals a season,to say nothing of the number of scalps I'd take. I'd play for nothing.

boltonbonce wrote:I'll play. I'm a wizard of the wing. I have the pace of a top class sprinter and the physique of a rugby league forward.I'd score at least 20 goals a season,to say nothing of the number of scalps I'd take. I'd play for nothing.

The price is right... now for Nat to agree to manage for the same price.

observer wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:I'll play. I'm a wizard of the wing. I have the pace of a top class sprinter and the physique of a rugby league forward.I'd score at least 20 goals a season,to say nothing of the number of scalps I'd take. I'd play for nothing.

The price is right... now for Nat to agree to manage for the same price.

Some chance. According to the Preston kerb crawling community she's a bit pricey.

I was a greedy, selfish bastard when I played for culcheth high school. I could maybe replace eagles, so count me in!

Culcheth_White wrote:I was a greedy, selfish bastard when I played for culcheth high school. I could maybe replace eagles,  so count me in!

Yes, every team should have a tart.

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Culcheth_White wrote:I was a greedy, selfish bastard when I played for culcheth high school. I could maybe replace eagles,  so count me in!

Yes, every team should have a tart.

You're being too harsh on yourself Nat.

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Culcheth_White wrote:I was a greedy, selfish bastard when I played for culcheth high school. I could maybe replace eagles,  so count me in!

Yes, every team should have a tart, with horrible tits.

 

Having wonky tits could be an advantage in selling a dummy when they go one way but the ball goes the other. Plus it would give us a laugh in the showers.

I'll play LB or CM... but even if I chose to play in CB in a blindfold and both hands tied behind my back, I'd still be a better player than Zat Knight.

Oy Keegan you weirdo, its football not a fetish party. 

Oh, behave.  

Mr Magoo wrote:Oy Keegan you weirdo, its football not a fetish party. 

Let Nat decide what type of party she is hosting!