Things in this country that annoy you

Reebok Trotter wrote:Obese people who cost the NHS £16 million per year because they are too fat to leave their homes.

Are they not better at home where we cant see them.

Indeed but it means that nurses and medical staff have to leave the hospital and travel to their home addresses to look after them. What with the cost of petrol and the damage to the environment and ozone layer, these fatties have a lot to answer for.

Reebok Trotter wrote:Indeed but it means that nurses and medical staff have to leave the hospital and travel to their home addresses to look after them. What with the cost of petrol and the damage to the environment and ozone layer, these fatties have a lot to answer for.

You mean being fat they fart a lot more thus damaging the ozone layer more than a skinny.

Yes, they give off as much methane as a cow. Plus, don't forget the carbon emissions from the medical staff's vehicles.

People who own cats but don't put a cat flap in their door.

The cat is sat on the doorstep sqwarking at silly o'clock wanting to get in.

Sad fuckers who post shit through peoples letterboxes because they have nothing better to do.

Catteries and cat breeders.

Burnley and its backward inhabitants.

Balls of string bought not for knitting a jumper but for a cat to play with.

Poor people who wear jumpers made of string.

Folk who wear string vests and own a cat.

Jimmy Anderson.

Recent things that irked me.

Bus drivers who don’t wait for people to sit down before pulling away from the bus stop;
Taxi drivers who use their horns instead of knocking on the door;
People who moan at the council about the streets being full of litter, not stopping to think that it is people who drop litter, not the council;
Grown men with replica shirts worn over their jumpers, who stand up and stretch out their arms when the opposing team fail to hit the target;
An assortment of scriptwriters, novelists and playwrights who own Agas but don’t know how to use them;
A musical equipment reviewer responsible for an article titled “Microphone of the Month”;
A woman who described herself as “A little bit Bridget, a little bit Ally, a little bit Sex And The City” and chose to call her baby boy Fred as a childishly rebellious attempt at a clever reaction to those who might have expected her to call him Julian or Rupert. Bit of advice: call him Rupert, it fits, and besides it’s a good name. Don’t be calling him Fred or Archie, with all its cheeky but lovable working class scamp connotations, unless you really do have plans for him to spend his life in William Hill’s waiting for them to weigh in at Newton Abbot.
A whole wall full of teenagers spitting needlessly;
An amateur thug in camouflage trousers whose Japanese fighting dog had run amok on a Swindon council estate;
A man from the record company who said that George Michael continues to challenge social taboos through his music;
Lisa Riley;
Continuity announcers introducing comedy shows;
A pub band who get uppity when everyone goes to the bar during a song they’ve written themselves;
A group of football fans referred to as Commodores, as in once, twice, three times a season, who feed sugar lumps to police horses at Cup Finals;
An artist who said his next album would be more “song-based”;
A man who informs people that he gets up at six am every morning and seemed to want a medal;
People who say they speak as they find and are somehow proud of it;
Journalists who try to spell an interviewee’s laugh;
An organisation who declared an awareness week for awareness weeks;
And a council worker who dropped litter.

Excellent post THC but I have to admit, I don't know what 'Agas' are/is.

Agas are the farmhouse style range cookers made by Aga.

I would love to take credit for the post but honesty compels me to admit it's stolen from a Half Man Half Biscuit song called Operation Less Pricks. Off the album CSI Ambleside I think.

Still a good one though

We had a bout of Cat's pooing in our garden, so i got in touch with the local Cat Exterminator , Sorted it no problem. The Birds are now singing merrily all day long.

Anybody know of how to get rid of noisy birds?

The blackbirds can be baked in a pie Banks.

You can only use between four and twenty though and the buggers still sing when the pie is opened.

largehat wrote:Poor people who wear jumpers made of string.

TheHateCamel wrote:
A group of football fans referred to as Commodores, as in once, twice, three times a season, who feed sugar lumps to police horses at Cup Finals;