I'm in love with a Prostitute

@Hipster_Nebula wrote:At least i can prove I sleep with Megan fox.

Bet Quent can't post a picture of his bird with her slender arm round his neck.

@Quent wrote:
She has changed, she is putting all that behind her. Tomorrow the rest of her life starts, no longer will she have to barter with punters for the bareback rate.

@Reebok Trotter wrote:Pig faced mute? WTF is one of those ? You folk from Devon and Cornwall are on another planet. I imagine Quent's moll driving an open top Suzuki Vitari with the sun in her hair. FWIW I think she is pretty but her threadbare wardbrobe makes me iclined to believe that she may be planning to do a bunk.

@Quent wrote:You'll be sorry Magoo. Tomorrow I'm going to post a photo of me and Marie driving off into the sunset (Gorton) in my Ford Focus.

@Quent wrote:You'll be sorry Magoo. Tomorrow I'm going to post a photo of me and Marie driving off into the sunset (Gorton) in my Ford Focus.

@Quent wrote:Shit, shit shit, I've really fucked things up. Can't stay long, I'm currently on the run from Percy the Pimp and his gangster friends.

Got to Marie's place this morning and her boss (pimp) answered the door and said Marie had decided to stay on the game, but there were no refunds for gifts bought by johns. I told him I wasn't a john, I was her boyfriend. He laughed out loud and went to shut the door in my face. Anger got the better of me and I hit him with the ironing-board I'd just bought from Homebase.

He might be a big bastard but he went down, so I climbed over him and went to fetch Marie. She was in the front room painting her toenails while watching Jeremy Kyle, clearly shaken by the whole episode. So shaken she seemed to be out of her mind, she refused to come with me saying she couldn't leave her boss (pimp) short staffed during this busy period. She wanted to leave it a few weeks before starting her new life.

Then she asked why I was carrying a Homebase ironing-board with blood dripping from one end. I told her I'd hit her boss (pimp) with it as he was clearly keeping her hostage. She ran to the door sobbing "Percy, Percy, are you all right?". She was clearly delierious.

So I had a decision to make, leave a clearly brainwashed Marie with Percy the Pimp or take her with me to start our new life. So I took her. She wasn't keen and I had to tie her to the ironing-board but I know she'll thank me later. She was making a lot of noise so I put her in the boot of my Ford Focus and drove off, just in time to see Percy the Pimp make a valiant effort to try and catch up with the car. Thankfully, years of living the pimp life has not been kind to his fitness.

So here I am, at some faceless motorway service station somewhere on the M1 heading for London, with a brainwashed hooker in the boot and a Percy the Pimp after my blood. Not sure what to do next, but at least I'm with Marie now.

@Quent wrote:Shit, shit shit, I've really fucked things up. Can't stay long, I'm currently on the run from Percy the Pimp and his gangster friends.

Got to Marie's place this morning and her boss (pimp) answered the door and said Marie had decided to stay on the game, but there were no refunds for gifts bought by johns. I told him I wasn't a john, I was her boyfriend. He laughed out loud and went to shut the door in my face. Anger got the better of me and I hit him with the ironing-board I'd just bought from Homebase.

He might be a big bastard but he went down, so I climbed over him and went to fetch Marie. She was in the front room painting her toenails while watching Jeremy Kyle, clearly shaken by the whole episode. So shaken she seemed to be out of her mind, she refused to come with me saying she couldn't leave her boss (pimp) short staffed during this busy period. She wanted to leave it a few weeks before starting her new life.

Then she asked why I was carrying a Homebase ironing-board with blood dripping from one end. I told her I'd hit her boss (pimp) with it as he was clearly keeping her hostage. She ran to the door sobbing "Percy, Percy, are you all right?". She was clearly delierious.

So I had a decision to make, leave a clearly brainwashed Marie with Percy the Pimp or take her with me to start our new life. So I took her. She wasn't keen and I had to tie her to the ironing-board but I know she'll thank me later. She was making a lot of noise so I put her in the boot of my Ford Focus and drove off, just in time to see Percy the Pimp make a valiant effort to try and catch up with the car. Thankfully, years of living the pimp life has not been kind to his fitness.

So here I am, at some faceless motorway service station somewhere on the M1 heading for London, with a brainwashed hooker in the boot and a Percy the Pimp after my blood. Not sure what to do next, but at least I'm with Marie now.

@Quent wrote:... Homebase are refusing to give me a refund for the bloody ironing-board.

@Mr Magoo wrote:Quent take a picture of her in your car boot.