Things that irritate the shit out of you

I used to work with a bloke that used to undo his zip and pull out a raw chicken neck as if it was his knob and start scratching it. It had the girls screaming. He kept ferrets.

Angry Dad wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:

Angry Dad wrote:Old people that suddenly shoot there false teeth out on their tongue and whip them back in again. Fuckin disgusting that.

Another work mate we used to have lunch with,used to bring a piece of cake in every day,and when he'd finished it,he'd take his false teeth out and lick them clean.

Aw that's just so out of order bonce.

First time I saw it I nearly puked.

Emilia Fox in Silent Witness. I wish some criminal would shoot her!

Any artist who shits in a tin.


Italian artist Piero Manzoni craps in a can. Not in THE can, Acan… 90 cans to be exact, and he did this in 1961 with the intention that each signed and numbered can of crap be sold for its weight in gold. As get-rich-schemes go, Manzoni’s was a trifle ambitious but the artist ended up getting the last laugh: a tin auctioned by Sotheby’s on May 23rd, 2007 sold for €124,000 and in October of 2008, the respected auction house offered tin #83 with an estimated selling price of £50-70,000. Dammit Mom, why’d ya hafta throw away my poop can collection??
(image via: Copy Shop Show)
Manzoni’s infamous cans were labeled in Italian, English, French and German with the English text reading “Artist’s Shit, contents 30gr net freshly preserved, produced and tinned in May 1961”. Though persistent rumors hinted that the cans were filled not with excrement but instead, plaster, the veracity of Manzoni’s labeling was proven when a can on loan to the Randers Museum of Art recently began to leak. According to a bacteriological expert called in by the museum’s curators, “the feces wanted out”... we’re guessing any visitors to the museum that day concurred mightily.

Twats who still haven't worked out the quote system on this forum, despite being on here for years.

Double twats!

Natasha Whittam wrote:Twats who still haven't worked out the quote system on this forum, despite being on here for years.

Double twats

That's me buggered then!!

Our maintenance department at work

Second hand junk being described as 'pre-loved'.

Water running up my arm, under my sleeve,when I'm washing my hands, (even though I've pulled them up as far as I can).

People who talk too loud when they're using their mobiles.

gloswhite wrote:Water running up my arm, under my sleeve,when I'm washing my hands, (even though I've pulled them up as far as I can).

Yes,I get that a lot when I'm washing my face. The bathroom floor,and my slippers,end up soaked.

Maybe I'm just messy.

Plastic milk bottles that are almost impossible to open.

I've gone back to Creamline Dairies,and a lovely morning delivery of milk in real bottles. Stick your thumb in,and it's open. Bliss.

And while I'm at it,white Mac keyboards. A pain in the arse to clean.

Jeremy Vine.....permanent grin, forced, cheery joviality, false laugh, embarrassing attempts to appear trendy. Annoys me more than Piers Morgan does!

Elvis Presley impersonators

The Daily Mail and particularly its editor Paul Dacre.

xmiles wrote:The Daily Mail and particularly its editor Paul Dacre.

Very absorbent though.

My own failings.....especially trivial ones like dropping things, or putting shorts on without getting foot stuck....

People who piss in the wash basin.

Angry Dad wrote:People who piss in the wash basin.

The poet,Robert Graves,did that a lot.

boltonbonce wrote:

Angry Dad wrote:People who piss in the wash basin.

The poet,Robert Graves,did that a lot.

Was it a Jug and Bowl