Bonce's own personal thread. Volume VII

boltonbonce wrote:Were there any decent slippers on show? A lot of these pervs have a slipper or shoe fetish.

Not only that, but some of these people use them for unnatural purposes. It's all very strange.

A friend of mine can't have sex without the aid of a Corby Trouser Press. He has to take it on holiday with him.

 No just lots of pictures with faces blurred out 

Cajunboy wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:Were there any decent slippers on show? A lot of these pervs have a slipper or shoe fetish.

Not only that, but some of these people use them for unnatural purposes. It's all very strange.

A friend of mine can't have sex without the aid of a Corby Trouser Press. He has to take it on holiday with him.

You can always judge a man by the company he keeps.

He's a vicar. He confided in me during a difficult time in his marriage. His wife had started experimenting with sex toys, and he was finding it difficult to keep up, if you'll pardon the pun.
She was also spending a fortune on batteries, and money was tight.
It was a difficult time for him, but I'm not judgemental.

Norpig wrote:I was straight on adultwork after that 

I have no idea what that is.

And I'm not Googling it, Sky already think I'm into grandad porn.

boltonbonce wrote:

A friend of mine can't have sex without the aid of a Corby Trouser Press. He has to take it on holiday with him.

Does he press his knob in it?

boltonbonce wrote:

Cajunboy wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:Were there any decent slippers on show? A lot of these pervs have a slipper or shoe fetish.

Not only that, but some of these people use them for unnatural purposes. It's all very strange.

A friend of mine can't have sex without the aid of a Corby Trouser Press. He has to take it on holiday with him.

You can always judge a man by the company he keeps.

He's a vicar. He confided in me during a difficult time in his marriage. His wife had started experimenting with sex toys, and he was finding it difficult to keep up, if you'll pardon the pun.
She was also spending a fortune on batteries, and money was tight.
It was a difficult time for him, but I'm not judgemental.

You can buy mains powered ones here

You will have to let your friend know!

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Norpig wrote:I was straight on adultwork after that 

I have no idea what that is.

And I'm not Googling it, Sky already think I'm into grandad porn.

I was well impressed at how real that fake fanny looked.

Shame about the face though!

Natasha Whittam wrote:

Norpig wrote:I was straight on adultwork after that 

I have no idea what that is.

And I'm not Googling it, Sky already think I'm into grandad porn.

Go on you know you want to. It has services advertised even you and Cedric would blush at.

I had a quick look on 5 player. I'm still in shock. I might add that a few of them in the programme could have used a trouser press. I've never seen so many wrinkles.

Norpig wrote:It has services advertised even you and Cedric would blush at.

Disrespectful. It's ERIC.

I can't believe my thread has been reduced to discussions about people doing 69's, whatever they are, and wrinkly old men making porn movies. 
The last time I was this upset was when the nurses hostel put curtains up. I also made the mistake of having a look at the programme concerned, and I have to say, standards have fallen dreadfully.
You wouldn't catch Jack Warner behaving like that.

Just snapped a front crown eating a vegetarian bacon sandwich. More bloody expense. Plus, I'm talking with a lisp!
I'm not happy. First available appointment is Feb 13th, so I'm stuck with it for a while.

You wouldn't get that with real bacon 

Norpig wrote:You wouldn't get that with real bacon 

Soup for a while.

I thought you would all be interested in today’s quick supermarket shop.

Here it is...

boltonbonce wrote:Just snapped a front crown eating a vegetarian bacon sandwich. More bloody expense. Plus, I'm talking with a lisp!
I'm not happy. First available appointment is Feb 13th, so I'm stuck with it for a while.

Hope you are not in too much pain Boncey!

karlypants wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:Just snapped a front crown eating a vegetarian bacon sandwich. More bloody expense. Plus, I'm talking with a lisp!
I'm not happy. First available appointment is Feb 13th, so I'm stuck with it for a while.

Hope you are not in too much pain Boncey!

No pain, but Jeremy Kyle keeps phoning me. Happily, managed to get an earlier appointment. Feb 3rd.

karlypants wrote:I thought you would all be interested in today’s quick supermarket shop.

Here it is...

Good shop for anyone who wants to shove bottles up their arse.

I can always make use of a few bottles from Shepherd Neame's brewery.

Not too sure about the rubber gloves and butter though, probably some old Breightmet Perverts initiation ritual.

Two great responses there guys as usual!

So now we're posting photos of our shopping and commenting on it?

Some of you need to take a good hard look at yourselves.

KP out.