Cricket's back!

Hip Priest wrote:New era, new captain, new coach, new mindset, same old fucking batting collapse. It's the hope that kills you!!!

.....and same mistakes with team selection: why have Pope at 3 when he has never batted there for his county or country....and why move Root and Bairstow from their recent batting positions where they have been doing so well?

 Form players with Test technique and class like Compton and Brook should have been selected. Why Leach before Parky? At least Leach had the decency to commit hari-kari for Parky's sake!

And why charge extortionate entrance fees? Money rules the ECB.

But the biggest crime is to be found with those like Crawley who repeat endlesssly the mistakes that have got them out so many times before.

On the plus side, bowling and fielding were outstanding.

Same old same old England but glad to see Parkinson has got his chance. Felt a bit sorry for Leach though, he doesn't have much luck does he?

England end up with a paltry lead of 9 which has been overtaken already.
I have a feeling that some of those Kiwi batters who went cheaply yesterday won't make the same mistake today and rack up a challenging score.
We could actually lose this game but a draw has to be favourite.

Well that was tortuous watching NZ demolish England's attack. No sign of a wicket and plenty more humiliation to come tomorrow with some big hitters yet to come in on the back of a healthy platform.

Here we go. Can England pull off the unlikely feat of scoring 277 to win the match?

Wow! An astonishing turnaround this morning! 

Almost as amazing as Lancashire's  T20 game last evening. No scriptwriter would have dared commit it to print!

Collapse is in progress already. Need a miracle from Root, Bairstow and the captain.

Only 61 needed this morning and as long as Root stays in then they should do it. It did look bad when Stokes was our early only to get a reprieve as it was a no ball.

Norpig wrote:Only 61 needed this morning and as long as Root stays in then they should do it. It did look bad when Stokes was our early only to get a reprieve as it was a no ball.

Lucky, lucky bugger - he was practically getting into the shower when he was called back

Now that Root and Foakes are in and the ball is getting old it's starting to look like a procession, but it could easily have gone the other way.

I have to say that when the Kiwis asked for the ball to be changed yesterday because it was out of shape, the one the swapped it for hasn't swung at all.
Be careful what you wish for.....

Bit of a stroll in the end - flat wicket, lifeless ball. Still well done Joe Root for making 10k test runs.

Back for more next week.

Just booked tickets for the South Africa test at Old Trafford at the end of August, looking forward to a day of cricket and drinking 

I think cricket is a bit like marmite, I could never take to it. For several reasons

!) the Ball is very hard
2) If your not batting, bowling, Wicket keeper, or the one poor sod who needs to catch the ball, your actually just a spectator.
3) The Kits shit (Home team)
4) The Kits shit  (Away team)
5) Any game that requires a cake and cup of tea in the middle is not a sport.
6) Should you need a jumper to play any game? 
7) The weather decides everything, Bad light for gods sake.
You can buy a ticket and the game is over before you take your seat ?????????????

At school i took 20 minutes to pad up, walked to the crease out first ball, take off pads. A really shit game for me.

A lady walked into a Police Station in Melbourne, Australia, and the Desk Sergeant said, "Can I help you ?”

"Yes," she said, "I'd like to report a case of sexual assault."

"Where did it happen?” the Sergeant asked.

"In the park just down the road," she replied.

"Can you describe what happened ?"

"Yes, I was walking along the footpath in the park near the trees when a man jumped out of the bushes and dragged me in there, removed my underwear then he dropped his pants to his knees and had his way with me."

"Could you give me a description of him ?"

"Yes, he was wearing white shoes, long white trousers, a white shirt and he had these two big long pads from his feet up to and over his knees."

"Sounds to me like he was a cricketer, most probably a batsman," said the Sergeant.

"Yes," said the lady, "He was an English cricketer"

"That's very observant," said the Sergeant, "You worked that out from his accent ?"

"No," she replied. "He wasn't in for very long"........

England win the toss and put NZ in to bat.
They then score the highest total any NZ team has ever scored in England. Ever.
Genius.

We’re not doing too bad in response. Currently 473 for 5.

Absolute joy to watch today - nothing in the pitch and England absolutely pasting the Kiwi bowling.

Looks like a draw as I can't see either team dismissing the opposition quickly on this pitch.

Really hope Olly Pope can kick on from here. I've always felt he's got the talent but just needs some self belief.

Perfect batting conditions: nothing in the lifeless pitch for seamers or spinners, nothing in the atmosphere that would make the ball swing.....even Brucie or Nat could score at will

okocha wrote:Perfect batting conditions: nothing in the lifeless pitch for seamers or spinners, nothing in the atmosphere that would make the ball swing.....even Brucie or Nat could score at will

Well it's swinging this morning, but Foakes and Root are carrying on regardless. Southee in particular is moving it about but the batsmen are just watching it on to their bats and so far so good...Root 164 Foakes 39 and counting.

That said, Root just got mugged with a slower ball from Boult for 176.