Bonce's own personal thread. Volume VII

I'm so jealous of anyone who can draw.

Just discovered that Ernest Hemingway's favourite sandwich was peanut butter and raw onion, washed down with rum.
I'm a fool to myself sometimes, but I've got to try one. If that old git could do it, then so can I.

Peanut butter and raw onion? The dirty Devil.

Hemmingway conducted a war by being an Ambulance driver in world war one as a reporter while drinking rosé in le chat noire in Paris, outside on a table and chairs.

sunlight wrote:Hemmingway conducted a war by being an Ambulance driver in world war one as a reporter while drinking rosé in le chat noire in Paris, outside on a table and chairs.

Funny old sod, and not as great a writer as he's made out to be.

I preferred some of his early stuff like 'Big Broads Don't Squeal', and 'Dumb Blondes Across The Potomac'.

He seemed to lose focus as he got older.

boltonbonce wrote:

sunlight wrote:Hemmingway conducted a war by being an Ambulance driver in world war one as a reporter while drinking rosé in le chat noire in Paris, outside on a table and chairs.

Funny old sod, and not as great a writer as he's made out to be.

I preferred some of his early stuff like 'Big Broads Don't Squeal', and 'Dumb Blondes Across The Potomac'.

He seemed to lose focus as he got older.

I agree. I read `the sun also rises`, and I dont drink. Hemmingway drank, therefore all his characters drank. Anyway I read a good 40 pages of `the sun also rises` one night before bed and I actually felt drunk, because of all the drinking they were doing, and the next morning I felt like I had a hangover. Which to be fair shows that hes good at putting across what its like to drink gallons of mixed spirits while smoking 60 tabs a night. So well done to him actually.

The Old Man And The Sea wasn't bad, but his love of bullfighting was always a turn off for me.

I was talking to an Alsatian Police Dog this week, and he was saying that he wanted a job that didnt just involve biting people. He said he thinks they are cast for stereo-typical rolls.

Jesus Christ!

Makes you wonder what he was pushing through the letter box.

I fancy a change of career, where do i apply to be a postman?

Norpig wrote:I fancy a change of career, where do i apply to be a postman?

Try Russia. They seem to set the bar pretty low! 

Well the Postman at chez nous has zero charisma. With a blank countenance he puts across what an inconvenience we are to him to have to keep bringing the post up our drive. He makes comments sarcastically with a sneer such as " Oh someones in demand ", and watch his face when he has to knock on the door because something wont fit through the letterbox.
He makes the sun shine brighter than Doris Day.

sunlight wrote:Well the Postman at chez nous has zero charisma. With a blank countenance he puts across what an inconvenience we are to him to have to keep bringing the post up our drive. He makes comments sarcastically with a sneer such as " Oh someones in demand ", and watch his face when he has to knock on the door because something wont fit through the letterbox.
He makes the sun shine brighter than Doris Day.

Our postie, Steve, is great, but I can't say the same about the people who deliver for amazon.

They ring and knock at the same time, then get agitated if you've not reached the door like Flash Gordon.

They sometime try to push things through the letter box that clearly won't go through, so leave it hanging, half in, half out.

Postmen as well as the climate activists could learn a few pointers from the Hermes Courier drivers. Of course I am talking about blocking roads off. What you need to do is to block the road off completely while you are parking in a way that causes yourself the least bit of hardship, and this includes if there is a perfectly legal and straightforward parking space just 2 metres away which wouldnt hamper any other living soul as he / she passes you happily in peace. Then you put your hazard lights on to sigify that its ok to park whilst causing maximum disruption to any road user. The key is that when you return a half of an hour later that you should simply smile, hold your hand up to fakely appologise and that makes it all ok.

boltonbonce wrote:Makes you wonder what he was pushing through the letter box.